Hey all, sorry I've been MIA. After Christmas I spent a couple days with my parents which was great. In fact, I had a mini breakthrough. I had resigned myself to believing I would not be getting a job offer from the job I interviewed for. I thought about it, and my work is doing this 60-day Goal/Review thing. We meet on the 4th to go over the goals. So, what's the worst that can happen? I prove myself and succeed and stay for years and years, OR I lose my job in 60 days. I have money saved and a 401k I could use. I'd be fine for a while. I would be devastated, but I would live. Then yesterday, I hear from the place I interviewed at and I have a second interview in an hour and a half. That put me in a huge spiral. People make these kinds of decisions every day, but I'm over here trying to figure out how much less money I can take if I get an offer, because they already told me they can't pay me what I'm currently making. I know my current job is not good for my mental health, but I will feel like I failed if I leave after less than two years. I know I need to do what's right for me, but how do I even decide that? Why can't I make these decisions without feeling like I'm going crazy?
Why can't I make any damn decisions w... - Anxiety and Depre...
Why can't I make any damn decisions without freaking out?
Because you are filled anxiety. I had written a lot more but erased it - why , because I am wracked with anxiety and can’t even think straight. Bottom line you are going to be alright - I’ll try and write more but just want to get this message to you and know that I support you.
Thank you so much! I appreciate it!
Thank you. I keep telling myself the same thing. I know it's horrible for me to even consider staying at a place that literally drove me to my breaking point. I have a hard time with change, but I know I need to make one right now. One of my current co-workers used to work at the firm I'm interviewing with and she said they are great people.
I am also in the battle of just walking out of a job because it is so hostile and it has caused me to take a total spiral. I have been interviewing, but my location is remote and I'm unable to move due to a custody situation with my kids. I desperately want to go back on Jan 4th and just quit. I have had some promising interviews....but I think I need to come to realization that I need a time out from work. In some way, I am hoping that a gap on my resume will be explainable due to COVID and homeschooling three kids. I totally get it and as I read some responses, I'm glad they align with my own thoughts. My husband wants me to get out and we will figure it out one day at a time. However, I cannot get past the panic of not having a job. So I'll go in on the 4th and put on a big face, and try as long as I can....but I wake up every day in complete panic with this job. BluePeppermint - I wish you the best.
I am right there with you. I'm thankful that I don't have any children to worry about, but I support my ex husband (we're best friends). He can't work and was denied disability. He has nowhere else to go, and I'm not about to put him on the street with his medical issues. My therapist actually asked me what if I put in my two weeks notice without having something lined up. I told her no way in hell. Even though I know I have enough access to money to get through for several months or a year, I simply do not want to be without work. The last time I was out of work was a month in Sept./Oct. 2001. I would feel useless if I quit without something lined up, even though I dread going to the office every day. It's horrible. They are horrible. I hope you find something soon! (Don't know what kind of work you are looking for, but I was doing transcription online for a while for extra money. If you type well, you could look into that).
I dont know right??? I don't have that with decision making but with getting stuff done. I keep. freaking.
out.
Especially when it comes to writing down my thoughts.
I just can't do it.
Writing down my thoughts is fairly easy for me. The why I think that way, however, is totally out of my reach. I don't understand why most adults my own age (middle aged), can do this all the time, but with me it's a big deal. When I was 17, we moved across country because my dad had been laid off and had an offer. He went through several jobs before landing the one he retired from. He didn't break like I did. Maybe inside he was freaking out, but I don't think so. He's very calm, cool and collected. Traits I did NOT inherit!
that bothered me too! I never know how people appear so collected and I wondered if there was something wrong with me!
But they ALL freak out, differently, depending on soo many things.
If freaking out is what you have to do right now, own it! Freak out like a boss! (I do that so its advice from me) and then see where it takes you :)))
Thank you! I heard from one of my references last night. He said he talked to the lady I interviewed with for about ten minutes and gave me a glowing recommendation. I finally have a small feeling of peace. Too bad I have to head to the office this morning.
Well that's some positive news. I know what going into work feels like and that pit. Hang in there and thank you for also understanding my situation!
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