Therapist dilemma

[insideout22]

since my gf ended things two weeks ago, I’ve had dreams of her leaving me in different ways every night. I wake up very sad and that feeling lingers for the rest of the day. This is just added on top of the “regular” major depressive episode I’m in the midst of.

I’ve known I need to find a therapist for a couple years now, but i’m hesitant. I did therapy for 5 years and although it definitely helped, I never went into any personal things besides superficial issues or my friend’s problems that I was involved in. Last year I scheduled an appointment with the university’s counseling center. I skipped the appointment because I was super anxious about it and then I did the same for the rescheduled appointment. I’m nervous that I will waste my time and the therapist’s, or that I won’t be able to make myself go because of the anxiety.

[Sky_clouds]

You can consider health unlocked. Write away You are anonymous and people are helpful here

[KariC126]

Hey, i am also going through a break up so i can completely feel what youre feeling. I had to force myself to go to a partial program in order to help my depression and i dont regret it at all. It has helped me with a lot of things in my life. Writing has helped me a lot at well! Dont let everything boil inside of you, let it out!

[Otaku12]

Going to see a therapist can be very intimidating, but once you find the right one it can be very beneficial. I've had to try several different therapists before I found one that I felt like I could really open up too. It took time too before I could really open up, so yes the first few months might seem superficial.

Don't ever feel like you are wasting the therapist's or your time by going to therapy. Even if you feel you don't get a lot out of it you are still being courageous in going and you are trying your best to get help. The therapist won't feel like you've wasted their time either because they know it is hard to open up and that it takes baby steps. Also, a lot of therapists have been in our shoes too and then became therapists because they wanted to help others feel better.

I hope this helps some. Just start by doing a search for therapists in your area and see if there are any that you might like to work with. You also should be able to do telehealth with the current pandemic still going on, so you can be at home where you're more comfortable and have the computer as a safety net.

Good luck!