Going back to work is scaring the hell out of me

[Purrsona]

Hi, I'm new here. I lost my job a few months ago and I'm almost out of unemployment. I want to get another full-time gig, but I know my most likely course of action is to freelance. Trouble is, the freelance lifestyle has always been incredibly stressful for me--I remember anxiety attacks, screaming fits at frustrations, lost sleep, just general awfulness, and that's when we weren't in a devastating pandemic and a precarious political situation (I'm in the US). Now with COVID-19 and some other bad life stuff giving me severe underlying anxiety, I have no idea how I'm going to cope with challenges on top of that. I just want to do nothing for a month and I probably could, but would that be an even worse idea? I will obviously need to make a living at some point, and maybe I shouldn't put off my tasks, but I'm just driving myself crazy worrying about it.

[Hidden]

I just thought I'd answer because no one else has. I don't know what I can say to comfort you. These are really rough times for sure. Just do the best you can, that's all you can do.

[Hidden]

Hi, speaking as someone just job hunting at this point, I will be turning to the work force after a year and a half of being off. So yeah I know how stressful and the heightened anxiety is influencing your thoughts right about now. I suffer from anxiety, social, panic attacks, and severe depression. I for one am very freaked to be going back to work after so much time. I admire that you are going to return to work and yeah you could take time off. The problem is the longer you wait the tougher it will be to go back. The following is my suggestion to further your mental health needs regarding your comments on this post. Only you will have enough information to chose which path you will need to take about going back to work so can't really advise you there. If you have access to therapist or perhaps someone close who's judgement you trust get input from them on the subject as they may know you far better to help guide you on your decision.

Now for my suggestion, for your post I can certainly guess you're anxiety is in high gear. Settling your thoughts to help clear your thoughts to make a more confident judgement would certainly bring clarity to your situation. There are a quite a few self help techniques to bring down the anxiety. Breathing exercises is an excellent choice. Meditation, exercising, having a friend listen and/or give freed back (aka talking), or even coming here is helpful. Hence the reply from me and the other person I see replied. There are many other self help ideas you can do and you can find them on youtube videos. Sometimes it may be that the anxiety is weighing too heavily on you in which case you can call a friend, spiritual leader i.e. pastor, priest, etc, to come keep you company. I hope you have someone you can call, but if not this place provides you people care as we suffer from some form of mental health issues that interfere with our lives both personal and work. I hope something of what I said is helpful. It's just the stuff I can think of off the top of my head. You are certainly welcome to contact me and I going throw the same thing but only if you're comfortable. There are others here that may step up to offer their attention too. It's tough call in your situation and you're not alone. You have my positive thoughts and energy in spirit to support you as well.

[Purrsona in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for your suggestions and support

[zonarosso]

Mediation has helped me a lot. This guy has videos with sounds of different frequencies that your mind and body react to. Try a few and see if any help. I find the lower frequencies help me (The Hz number is the frequency, the lower the number the lower, the musical note.) youtube.com/c/AnthonySommer,

This is a typical guided meditation. Try not to put any expectations on yourself. Just find a quiet place and with headphones just close your eyes and listen.No pressure.

youtube.com/watch?v=O-6f5wQ...(Not working as expected?)

I hope you find the right job! Keep trying and ask a lot of questions during interviews. Don't feel pressured to take a job that isn't right. Write down the questions if it's hard to think under pressure. Good Luck!!