Need Advice on trial separation!

[SadMommy]

Hello, My daughter and her husband are doing a trail separation of two months. They've been married a year, but have been together for 11 years. I think the two biggest problems are she is jealous and he thought if he married her, that would make her stop, but it's only been worse. (He never really had his own friends and now he has coworker friends who include a woman.) My daughter now admits that this is a problem with her due to low self esteem. I think the other major problem is he was an only child of divorced parents and has basically lived by himself and is not emotional and likes to be alone, whereas my daughter likes to be around people and has always had someone around to talk to. He wants her to know that she can stand on her own, he says. He also says he spends all of his time trying t make sure she is happy that he hasn't taken care of himself.

My question is, do separations ever work? They are not going to a counselor. Thanks!

[HekatHushla]

Oh boy. They can, I suppose. My boyfriend and I have done it.

The key to it, at least for us, was taking the time to focus on ourselves and how we can get better as an individual so that we can be in a healthy relationship.

We also did a few couples sessions.

[SadMommy in reply to HekatHushla]

Thanks! How long did you stay apart and did you talk at all during that time?

[HekatHushla in reply to SadMommy]

We were apart about 3 months and we did still talk, however that was mostly because we had to move out of our apartment. And we were coordinating for couples therapy. We tried to just stay civil and keep conversation relatively objective and not emotional.

[Cantdealanymore]

Its a slippery slope especially this early on in their marriage. She can work on her self esteem and co dipendency issues while living under the same roof

[SadMommy in reply to Cantdealanymore]

That's what I thought, but he thinks otherwise.