Cursed man

[JPMcG]

My dog died yesterday from a preventable accident. I’m grief stricken. My life has been a series of tragedy and poor decision. I feel like I am a cursed man who has only misery. From my birth to 40 something now I’m always in damage control fight or flight. My ability to cope is waning and I really don’t see the point in dying naturally. Please help me to understand what is wrong with me. I don’t know where to turn. I have no one aside from my spouse whom is moving to the Springs in effort to rebuild her life apart from the past few years of suffering I feel. I live in fear and insecurity and can’t even say good morning to strangers because I don’t have any self esteem. My poor dog was senile and I really fucked up leaving her alone. Now she’s dead and it is my fault.

[deidre_chi]

Hello there. First of all, you are loved, more than you could possibly ever know. Our human capabilities do not allow us to understand the full capacity or meaning of love. Please remember that when you go through difficult times, someone else has already travelled this path before you. You are never alone. We live in an amazing universe where we are all truly connected. When one of us hurts, all of us hurts.

[Ambien1711]

It is NOT your fault. You did not know it was going to happen. You cannot expect yourself to be psychic. And NEVER blame yourself for what you did not know at the time. It was your precious dog's time. NOTHING and NO ONE could have prevented it. I am here to talk if you need. You can get your life together by starting to make smart choices today. Get financial and health advice. Your bank will give you free financial advice. And most health advice can be found online. Work on your relationships. They need nurturing. You can make a better life for yourself NOW and not feel so cursed. You can learn healthy coping strategies. I know it will be hard seeing as you just lost your best friend, but I promise that you will see her again and that she is very happy now and when it is your time, she will be 1st to greet you. Please check out this site: topdogtips.com/rainbow-bridge/ I hope my pep talk helps you. You are free to message me. You found Health Unlocked for a reason the day you discovered it. There are people here for you.

[Hidden]

It's a mirror in a way ...these posts. Everyone related in their own way, you reflecting parts back that we all need to work on.

I have imposter syndrome where I constantly feel cursed or like my choices had consequences that are so repugnant it could only be wrong place, wrong timing. I wrecked the natural order of things through poor decision making.

But being personally strong is my goal. I have low self esteem also. But I don't want to die.

Exercise may have....saved me. It gave me a purpose and dopamine and an outlet and strength. I hated it and the idea of it at first but.....it's like a club.

[Sprinkle1]

So sorry for your loss. Please do Not blame Yourself, life has so many twists and turns in it, a lot of them are not nice.

First thing is you must Not put yourself down, we are all special and lovable. Love is boundless, I have found when I give love I just keep filling up with it. So I send you a bushel right now, with hugs attached.

There is nothing wrong with you, you are in grief, and that is an awful thing to deal with, do not blame yourself, you did what you had to do at the time, your dog was probably ready to go, s/he is in heaven now and will be there to greet you. That is what I say about all my cats that have passed, we will all be together in a lovely peaceful place.

Can you talk with a therapist? Go online and look for help with grief. Your strength and energy will return, especially if you learn to love, accept and respect yourself. I went thru all this, thru therapy I learnt to love myself at age 40.

Also in a Spiritual group I was in I learnt to live in the moment, the past is exactly that, it is dead and gone, so leave it there, only bring up Good memories. Tomorrow has not got here yet, so do not dwell on it, face it and enjoy it when it shows up.

Do you read, the library has books on loss and grief. Another book I highly recommend is by Dr. Scott Peck "The Road Less Traveled", It made a big difference in my life, Amazon has it new/used. Books by Dr. Claire Weeks are great.

Get some exercise, walk in the fresh air and sunlight if you can, get the Vit.. D, our skin needs that. Ride your bike if you have one. Listen to pleasant music, learn to meditate, that is Very useful. Do not watch the news or read the paper, nothing but bad news for the most part, I gave it up years ago. Write to us here, we offer love and support, we here have suffered, some are suffering, we know the pain and can identify with you....Sending Love, Strength, Courage, Peace and Big Hugs........

[san_ray70]

Years ago when I was young we had a lovely dog Judy was her name, the trouble was she loved people. When she thought she knew you, she wanted to get where ever it was you were. Her downfall was my brother, he went out the door not realising she followed him. She ran in the road and a car hit her, as I say this was years ago, but every dog we have had since abot 6 in my life. They were taught never to go out without a lead, unless called out by her master or mistress. Dogs are a huge part of our lives and I will miss my last dog when he dies, he is 12 and I hope he lives a fair bit longer. Everybody has bad luck, but life is what you make it, so make the most of it please.