Can’t get out of my mind

[brokenankle75]

I am a recovering drug addict and alcoholic and I made a lot of mistakes. However, my sons dad is a recovering drug addict but he still drinks which has nothing to do with this post that I’m talking about. the only reason why I bring that up is because he wants to be part of that family but not mine. My sons graduation picture his dad was on the left, my son was in the middle, and I was on the right. My son scratched out my face and posted it on Facebook for the whole world to see. I can’t put into words how this makes me feel. Exercise used to be a release for me But it doesn’t help anymore. Talking about it doesn’t help. Journaling doesn’t help. Staying busy doesn’t help. I can’t remember what else I’ve tried. I’m stuck in this nightmare in my mind

[Tiggerakafidgity]

Hi there broken

I’m so sorry to hear what anguish you are going through.

Do you have a sponsor through na or aa as I guess there are no groups being held just at this moment.

I know what it feels like to try every thing but nothing seems to work.im gonna point blank you CAN do this,it’s gonna be hard to you can get through this.

I know drugs and alcohol are all to do with quashing feelings so one doesn’t have to deal with them which for human kind is the norm in the short term but never works as leads on to other disastrous acts.

Can I ask did you actually see your son scratch your face out or was it perhaps the encouraging your son to do this very unkind act ?

Look you say exercise writing doesn’t help.it most probably does but you just can’t see it right now and perhaps say if your exercise is 10 mins long make it 20 mins and really push.i remember from past experience and being in a similar position that,just that extra little push that yes I know we don’t want to do with get those endorphins fired up.go he’ll for leather take your frustration out on the weights or a punch bag.feels so much better.perhaps what you may well have is just pent up anger ,I know I would.just go hit a punch bag.really exhaust your self,feels so much better.

Please please don’t go back to the old ways,you’ve come so far.dont let the dad win.in most cases it’s the adult who has the child that poisens against the other adult to hurt that person.

Be in the knowledge your doing a far better job than the dad.

I would like if possible for you to post tonight if possible to just say you’ve been clean for another day.

Remember the twelve steps.

Even if you pm me just with the words clean will do unless you want to further on the chat.

Be strong.its just feelings at the end of the day and they can’t kill us just don’t let it destroy you

Have a clean day

[bobpollard]

You can't control what other people do and you can't control their feelings. You can control what you do, and you can do what you think is the best thing in any situation.

[SuZQ154]

So sorry! When my mind is fixated like you are describing, I try to pray and ask, "What do you want me to do, God?" and then LISTEN...and then act, even if I do not feel like doing what I feel I am being lead to do.

Today, my mind was fixate on a negative family. situation So, I asked what I should do and felt lead to do my Bible study. I DID IT and felt much better. Then I felt lead to go on this site. I feel better now because I read about others who are struggling but their situations are getting better!

This site is helpful! It give us HOPE! I have hope knowing others have gotten through tough times. I am encouraging you to do what you feel lead to do. Even if you do not feel like it.

HUGS!

[brokenankle75 in reply to SuZQ154]

I feel bad cuz when I read my bible I always feel better but I just haven’t been doing it. I think about it every single day yet don’t do it