So I’m clingy: As if it’s really a... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

89,856 members84,185 posts

So I’m clingy

Scatteredtulips profile image
7 Replies

As if it’s really a surprise that. with all my issues, I’m the clingy one of my relationship.

This morning I woke up to text my boyfriend good morning before he got ready to go to work, like I always do. Are usually get a response of a good morning and then he’ll get ready and text me when he gets there. He didn’t text me once so I continued to text him in panic and being concerned. And he got frustrated with me and said “I love you baby I really do but the overreacting and the clinginess can be suffocating at times, I need you to ease off it a bit”.

And this is because I’m a worry-wart, as my mom says. I worry and overthink and he’s not wrong. But like I don’t know how to act now. I feel like I have to show my love for him less and not talk to him and just leave him alone. Like I feel like I need to make myself distant.

I’m so worked up about this because that’s what left me with no one in my life before him. I because distant because people felt I was overbearing or overwhelming. I just love too much and I’m insecure and I’m the exact explanation for what causes clinginess.

I just. How do I even back off with that stuff but still show him I love him and care about him? How do I find the balance? Cause I feel like I’m incapable of that and I need to be alone if i can’t.

What do I even do?

Written by
Scatteredtulips profile image
Scatteredtulips
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
7 Replies
Sprinkle1 profile image
Sprinkle1

First of all , have you thought about talking to a therapist about this. A therapist could help you look at your behavior and show you ways to change. To build your self confidence, to let your worrying go. It sounds as if you do not change you will loose your boyfriend. Let me tell you a couple of things I learnt that helped me stop worrying 1. Worry is like a rocking chair, it is in motion, But it is going No Where!!!! 2. 50 % of the things we worry about Never Happen, the other 50 % If they happen we deal with them then......So why worry, I have not worried about anything for over 30 years. I am happy and fulfilled, if a problem crops up I deal with it, and get on with my life. So give it a try, be kind to yourself, life is a struggle, do not make it worse for yourself.....Hugs n Love.....Sprinkle 1......

Scatteredtulips profile image
Scatteredtulips in reply to Sprinkle1

I’ll give it a try. Thank you!

in reply to Sprinkle1

Really like yurvthinking sprinkle

hi just reply love you too . chat soon. he still loves you but he is working and

has to keep going. wait for him to reply in his own good time. if he texts you keep him waiting.

in reply to

It’s tough

Risky to let go and lose someone risky to not say I care a million times so they know

Lose them

Because I loved too much or seemingly not enough

Takes time to find out what the other person nedds

He could have said hey u only called once nit twelve times like my last girl

Or u didn’t send ten cards u only called

So at least u care

At least u tried

At least u care

At least u found a good man

At least u like him

s I’ve met plenty of women who hate me just standing there

At least u worry about losing him

V

My family who could care less

Maybe ur friend should spend some time with my family

He’d kiss u for calling

See as u know it’s relative to the person of the dance and as u know they all differsint they

Do I call

Should I write

Should I not call

Hey the intent is right Ur heart is there

He could have a cold bitch that mocks him. Oh sorry u care

Oh so sorry he’s important to u

Yes I get your point

But

Try living in a relationship

When

No

One

Ever

Calls

Or anytging

Yes I get ur point

Try not to be toooo hard on an innocent

Innocent mistake

Unless u are supposed to be a mind reader

Hey

At least u love and care about him

Think about that too

At least u care

in reply to

you are loving and caring but want more from the relationship than he is prepared to give. y u are afraid he wont return your texts and if you don't hear from him as you have set the times for him to call he feels you are in control . you have to give him space. if you don't hear from him then he is either cooling off or has a problem. we have a virus lock down here perhaps this is a shared worry with you. there are a lot of fears and you want him to chat to comfort you and support you may be. may be he will lose his job and is in a state of stress. if you text just as him how he is don't talk about yourself. let him do the work in the relationshio as well. humourm makes life easier , take care.

ps

you are probably very pretty so other girls don't like you. a pair of specs can make all the diiference ha ,

in reply to

lovely poem but you look after yourself as you are worth it. men don't think like women so if they say they don't like clingy women you have to play their game and switch off trying to please and feeling insecure when you feel you have failed. this person may not be the right one for you take care.

You may also like...

I’m so alone. But I’m afraid of change.

help me. Now I’m stuck with horrible anxiety and depression. Constantly worried about what would...

I’m so depressed I blew it with a good guy

I’m literally in such a bad way. I’m in hospital because I blew it with a guy that was so decent. I...

I’m so done

I’ve tried not talking to him when I’m anxious (most of the time!) or if I’m ruminating on...

I’m so scared.

Right now I’m having terrible anxiety. I’m scared and I’m tired of being alone but at the same time...

I’m feeling so bad l want to leave life now.

the past. I’m so very worried about my dog as he was very cruelly treated before l had him and he...