A little while ago I wrote a post about how excited I was that I finally quit my job, and I was excited to get my life back on track. Unfortunately I think I took on too much at a time: I quit, started looking for jobs, and intense counselling all within a few days. The result: I have completely shut down from being overwhelmed.
Turns out therapy can have a "hangover" period, and after forcing myself to divulge everything about my past trauma in one session I ended up useless and crying in bed for a month.
Now I'm slowly picking myself up again, but I feel like I'm too stupid to work any job. I used to be pretty self-confident, but during my last job it felt like everyone treated me like I was too stupid to understand even the most basic concepts. Eventually, I started believing it myself and now I can't get out of my head. Frustratingly, it was only after I quit that my supervisors told me they thought I was a great worker and quick learner, but I can't really believe them wholeheartedly.
This is all just me making excuses again, it pretty much boils down to I'm frozen with fear. I wrote my resume, have a cover letter ready to tailor for jobs. However, every time I come across a job I want I convince myself I won't be able to do it, and then I go to bed and just cry. Now I'm thinking I'll just have to go work in retail, nothing wrong with that but not exactly what I want for a career and right now I should be building a career. How do I get away from my depression brain and just do the things I need to do???
I don’t have much advice because I am in a similar situation but wanted you to know that you’re not alone.
I left my last job because my new boss was an idiot who gaslighted me into believing that I am not capable to doing my job.
Today was the first day at my new job and I’m letting my old boss’s comments get into my head and causing me to doubt if I can handle this new job.
My advice is to send out your resume, go to every interview and when you are hired for a job - believe in yourself, even if you have to fake it (which I’m doing right now). The employer who hires you obviously sees that you are more than capable to do the job and that is why they chose you!
Thanks, it's nice to know it's not just me having these thoughts. I hope everything at your new job goes well, definitely hope you have a better boss!
It may have been a better way if you looked for another job from being in Work.
However you have had Therapy, had one session and now you feel Yuk. Are there any further therapy sessions, normally around ten sessions before move off without support.
You did well with your past work, take that now as a given and move on. You could if your past employer agrees go back to the firm you were at.
Depending on the sort of work you are looking for write your resume and send of to other companies. You could even try to visit various companies and see if they need someone like you to work for them. Sad to say I suppose you will need to wait until this virus has been beaten.
You need to have confidence and there is no reason why that is not the case. Look for that job, you will most probably be surprised.
For me to be able to get out of any negative thinking, I had to learn to redirect my thoughts to what I know is the truth. I start my day by reading my Bible, devotions, and praying for others. It helps me to refocus my thoughts and to set my day on the right path. Sometimes, even after I had done all of these things, I would get to work and fight anxiety. Then, I would recall some of the Scriptures that addressed those feelings and I would speak these words to myself. I also listened to Christian music, turned down low so as not to bother anyone else in the office, and I would listen to the calming words that were sung.
For me, there is strength, hope, and peace written throughout the Bible and no one can take that away from you. I hope some of my ways of dealing with anxiety, depression, or any of the changes and challenges we are dealing with in life are helpful to you, too.
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