I keep going back into these like “episodes” where one small thing will upset me and i just spiral into a pit of sadness. I don’t know what to do. I just get hurt by every little thing, and when I’m talking with my boyfriend i try and tell him he’s better off with some other girl because there are so many out there that are better than me in all ways.
I start to hate on myself and i cant stop it.
hey, hunbunny i know you probably dont wanna here someone tell you that its gonna be okay but i know that it doesnt feel like it right now but trust me it will be okay everything will be fine just breathe smell the flowers and blow out the candles i dont know you but i can already tell that you are a beautiful person and you are definetly the girl that every boy begs to be with stop hating on yourself, you are perfect just the way you are. and trust me once you hit the bottam the only place to go is up oneday you'll be on top you'll see think of this a your cacoon faze and oneday you will get out of this cacoon and be a butterfly i sincerly hope that you get better and if you need anything and i mean anything dont hesitate to email me.dont worry worry you're not alone and you will never be
Thank you so much :”)!
Hi this is me to a tee as well. Some times little things don't worry me but at others I can spiral down very quickly to being positively suicidal. This always takes me by surprise as I have a tendency to be detached from my feelings. I am starting to recognise a pattern though. This usually happens when I feel very good about myself and life. It's like my depression is kicking me saying hey don't forget me.
I have changed the way I respond to it now. At the beginning of the spiral I now kill it stone dead and if possible talk about it with an understanding friend. I also post in here and get loads of positive messages back which really helps. I consciously pay more attention to my feelings and remember the maxim 'Keep your words soft and sweet as you never know which ones you might have to eat'.
If you are like me the cycle doesn't last very long so be aware that you will survive this one as you have the others. I hope this helps a bit. x
Thank you so much :”)! It’s pretty much the same thing i go through so its nice to have someone who understands through experience but of course I’m sorry you do. I really appreciate the advice!
Good I am am glad if my advice helps a little. At least you know you aren't alone. I have suffered from depression since childhood and past counselling and current ad's help me quite a lot.
I have only ever been diagnosed with depression, but think I suffer with 'double depression ' or dysthermia (not sure of spelling) or even bipolar 2. There is lots of information online about these so have a look. x
Hello,
We haven’t spoken before but the symptoms you describe are really the same as mine. The smallest of circumstances can bring on the symptoms which are bewildering and frightening. Something as small as say the kitchen roll running out, although this example is obviously connected to a bigger picture. The feeling is so intense that I cry soon after it hits and I too at that point feel suicidal. It feels like a massive wave that goes from my head and into every part of my body and leaves me totally mentally exhausted. I don’t fight the feeling and let it run it’s course, but it doesn’t wear off for a couple of hours and I find it difficult to speak in the time after. I don’t know about yourself but it’s the mornings that are worse although last night was bad and had to lay down at 9.30pm for 30 minutes and then I felt better.
Yes exactly, sometimes the feeling can stick for more than just a night or a couple of hours, and it goes into the next day. It sucks. Its hard to get out of. I feel bad about going through these “episodes” because my boyfriend is always ready to do something fun or just talk to me but I’m not in the mood.
Its hard explaining how i feel and why.
You are exactly right there about a descriptive word about the feeling. If like me you have tried to write it down what the feeling is, then there is nothing you can put in writing. The only words of comfort for you are that whatever the feeling/symptoms you feel then I have found it best not to question it but just let it be and run it’s course. By questioning the feelings/symptoms I think it just fuels it more
You’re right, thank you !:”)
Yes I do get ones like that too, but find the longer cycles deeper and worse. I remember one bad attack on an online site (not here) where 2 people were really nasty after I put in a response to someone else. I was shocked to my core and all my negative thoughts came rushing up swallowing me whole. Within a few minutes I was positively suicidal and was convinced that I was rubbish. I had to physically stop myself from going to sit on my garden rubbish pile and laugh hysterically! Looking back I can see the funny side but at the time I thought it was where I belonged. Very scary.
The trouble is counsellors or doctors never seem to understand that not every suicidal person has a plan so if I am asked this I say no coz 90 pc of the time I don't. I have said this can escalate very suddenly for me but am dismissed. I wonder how many suicides are people like me? I feel of little value and misunderstood by them. x
Its scary, you just feel so hopeless so suddenly. Its unfortunate they dismiss you, im sorry. Maybe its rare?
I don't think so. It's just that medics are trained to think a certain way and new ways of thinking to the contrary tends to take a long time to trickle through. x
Oh i see, unfortunate.
You need to start loving yourself girl! No one will do it for you, but I understand how hard it is when ur depressed....
Read Joel Osteen’s books, they changed my life-that’s if u believe in God, idk if u do or not. That guy is so positive and inspirational
Mental breakdown 
Terrible breakdown
Another tough day 
Breakdown
