I've only been on HU for about a month now but I've seen some pretty cool usernames. I was wondering if some of you guys would feel comfortable sharing the stories behind them!
My username basically comes from my passion for music, mainly singing. I write music as an outlet for my pain and almost a cry for help at times and it's like nobody seems to hear me so that is where I got that. As for the 55, I have OCD, and I tend to do things in fives. I count to five in my head when I'm anxious, I count my steps by five, I even eat in fives. I call it my comfort number.
What are the stories behind your usernames?
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SilentSinger55
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I’ll talk about both parts of my username. First, demure. One day I was reading this book and I read this word. Unfamiliar with it, I looked it up and it just fit. It’s usually used to describe a woman who is shy, modest or reserved. Other than shy, those words originated for me. It just fit me so well that I wanted to use it for my username.
Now Rose is less of a story. I have always loved the word rose. It’s just so beautiful and elegant and I know that’s weird for a word to look elegant and beautiful but in my mind it is. It just always brings a smile to my face when I see it.
I've always kinda had a thing for the word rose, too. I've always known that when I grow up I want one of my children to have rose as a middle name. I also find your story with the other word to be very fascinating and I've also had experienced in which I've found that one word that just seems to fit me perfectly.
Honestly my username is one I had ages ago on a community support app that was auto generated and I liked it so I kept it! I don’t really know why, I guess I just thought Delilah sounded really pretty. Plus, that community platform was the first I had ever used of that nature and it encouraged me to continue reaching out for support, so keeping the username around kinda reminds me of why I’m here.
Good question. I often wonder about names myself, and how they originate.
After my mom died, almost 3 years ago, I found myself with such debilitating BRAIN-FOG. It would hover in varying degrees, and what I thought was complete brain-fog cover at one point—wasn’t even close to what I learned it could be later on. My point of reference on the FOG kept changing.
This thick dark cloud covered me so. It made me confused, and spacey, and numb. It took away my happiness, my routine, my elasticity, my CONFIDENCE in what I thought I knew about myself.
It would come and go...but not really go. Sometimes I could function...and then suddenly just crash-and-burn. And then weeks turned into months, turned into 1 year...and then 2 years. What? That is a long time. I thought I would never feel better. Seriously! It all made me feel weak, unstable, flighty, and flakey. Nothing like I was accustom to feeling...
The brain-fog made it IMPOSSIBLE for me to work, to be motivated, to accomplish anything. I remember during the worst of it, I kept saying that I felt so INCOMPETENT....bc I couldn’t even hold it together to work. I had lost my stability, personal control over my feelings, my schedule, my motivation, my ability to get my Mojo back...and be so great at my job...like I was before...not to mention my LIFE!
I’ve always been a NINJA, in one form, or another. Haha. That’s how I picture ME tackling problems, or when I really put my mind to something...to beat it...to kick its butt! That’s when I’m NINJA strong!
Although I was miserable for the the first couple years after mum died, I was quite determined throughout to figure out how to feel better. How to beat the grief, the brain-fog, the devastation. Stress, and illness, add to the brain-fog...they always make it worse.
And then, when I thought it finally started lifting...it seemed like I had morphed into a completely different person. I could hardly recognize myself. I thought I was permanently broken, and that it would last forever. Thankfully, It didn’t.
Later I realized, when it finally lifted...is when I could see that I hadn’t changed into a different person at all, and that I was under there all the while.
What a relief! I was just covered with the FOG, and couldn’t recognize myself with all of that on top of me. I think this realization happened simultaneously with “accepting” what had happened, both in my mom passing, AND my experiences following that.
I can recall when I was younger and running distances, my running mantra included reassurances from my NINJA self to get me through the physical pain, and mental challenges of running.
Apparently, when the going gets tough — I call on my inner NINJA for help...🛡⚔️🛡
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What are your coping skills for your depression?
Anxiety Interfering with Daily Activities
How would other people act in this situation? Not sure whether to ditch this friend.
What memories brings laughter or makes you smile or makes you feel comforted in some way?
Trying to feel I am okay 
