Burnt Out. Thinking About Checking Myself In...

[puppypancakes3]

I'm just so tired of being this way. I hate everything about myself, and I just don't want to go on any more. Maybe it's because I haven't been to therapy in a while, but I just have no motivation to go. I know when I get there I'll have to think about all the horrible things that go through my head, and I just don't have the energy to do it. I'm tired of thinking so much. I hate having to worry about school and the future, when all I can think about is how much I don't want to be here. I have no energy or motivation to get things done. I just want to sleep. I keep thinking about whether or not it would be worth it to check myself in somewhere. Maybe once I finish school, if things are still not going well. It just seems ironic, that I'm studying clinical psychology, and here I am thinking about becoming a patient at a place where I might work someday. I thought I was over that. I already spent three months in a program before coming to college, and I thought that was going to be it. I just don't want to go through it again, because it feels like I'll be setting myself back for some reason. It's like if I do check myself in somewhere, it makes it real. I just don't want to be honest with myself with how bad it really is. I don't want to live like this, but I also don't want to fix it, because that means something is wrong with me. Maybe I'm rambling, and maybe I'm thinking too much about it. I just don't know what to do. I have no motivation either way.

[LadyZen]

If you do go the clinical psychology route, I believe therapists are required to go to therapy themselves while they are in practice. There was a time in my 20's that I knew there was something seriously wrong with me, but I really didn't know how to help myself. Therapy never really crossed my mind. So you're already one step ahead of where I was in that you know it's always an option.

[Bluetj]

Even if u do check urself in some place, there is nothing wrong with gettn help. In the last 3 yrs I have checked myself n2 a behavioral health facility twice. Never in a million years did I ever thought I would be n a place like that. I'm just glad I had somewhere to go.