New to anxiety I guess??

[kieerraa]

Hey! so I'm probably going to have to go back to basics for someone to understand and hopefully help me out...

So i'm a student paramedic, and before this course I was at college studying a 'access to higher education' diploma (which was September 2018)... whilst at college I started to get this feeling, of being overwhelmed, and nervous all the time. Some mornings I would wake up and not know how to feel, and sometime even feel like I didn't know if I was coming or going [a bit all over the place I know]. I haven't been to my doctors or spoken to anyone about this, as i'm scared of what people will think. Being a student paramedic, people think we're complete tough cookies, but I feel like i'm really struggling at the moment (nothing to do with the course, but just in general, more like home life, which I think this is why I'm scared to talk to anyone about it). We unfortunately lost my uncle on the 30th January 2020, which this has made my feelings/ emotions spiral out of control [which doesn't help the situation].

How did other people go about talking to their doctor about it? [Should I even talk to my doctor about it? or see how I get on?] I feel like when I think about it, or want to go and speak to someone, I feel like i'm going to burst into tears, because of feeling overwhelmed. I just feel like I need to calm down, every single morning.

If someone could help, or give me a little bit of advice that would be great!

Thankyou!

[Lioness4]

Please don’t try to tough it out. Burst into tears or song...your feelings and emotions are valid regardless. When I was in nursing school, I had a great deal of almost paralyzing anxiety. I lost my father and grandma within 5 months of each other. I made it through and so can you. Yes talk with your doc and cry. Don’t hold it in. I was able to tell one of my fellow students what I was feeling. It was a load off my chest. The conversations can be hard to start but just allow yourself to rattle, babble, and cry!! Another tip, I used guided meditations and progressive relaxation. It helped a lot. YouTube them.

[kieerraa in reply to Lioness4]

Atleast I'm not the only one!! thankyou, I'll try them out!

[Agora1]

kieerraa, I am very sorry about your uncle. Life at times can make us spiral

out of control. That is when it is perfectly alright to seek professional help

whether it be with therapy and/or medication for a while.

As having been a former Chicago Paramedic, I agree that many wonder how

we can handle the job as a first responder. I felt at the time that I was two

different people emotionally. When I was on the job, I kept my emotions intact.

When at home and in family life, I would be affected by different family situations

that arose. After all, we are human. I've seen the bravest of brave privately break

down and cry after getting back to the station when witnessing some devastating

calls.

Please talk with your doctor. You need to be in control of your life before you

can reach out in helping others. I wish you the best in following your paramedic

goals. xx

[BlueSky125]

I would look into general anxiety disorder (gad) , it seems to fit what you are describing. You could start by looking up information on it. Does your school have counselors that you could talk to.

Symptoms of GAD

Excessive, ongoing worry and tension

An unrealistic view of problems

Restlessness or a feeling of being "edgy"

Irritability

Muscle tension

Headaches

Sweating

Difficulty concentrating

Nausea

The need to go to the bathroom frequently

Tiredness

Trouble falling or staying asleep

Trembling

Being easily startled

[Hidden]

I was a Paramedic too. It was a very stressful, anxiety provoking job. I'm not saying you can't do it but it is so difficult.

[EleanorRose]

Hey 😊

There are so many things I could say but I don’t want to make this too long!!

I sense you’re worried about not making sense/people not fully understanding you but I think you’ve given a really good overview of how you’ve been feeling and have explained perfectly. It sounds very much like anxiety to me. If you’re struggling to talk to people or are not sure what to say to a doctor, perhaps start by showing them/telling them what you’ve written here?

There is nothing wrong with crying because of feeling overwhelmed. Talking to people (and having a cry) can be a great relief in itself. If it’s a bit difficult to talk to family, do you have anyone else you could confide in?

Absolutely anybody can struggle regardless of who they are and what they do. There are stereotypes and assumptions out there that are false but I do think society in general is slowly moving away from that. I am sure you will make a brilliant paramedic but you don’t have to be superhuman. You can save people’s lives and still have your own struggles - it’s normal, it’s part of what makes us human and it has no reflection on your ability to do your job.

Speaking out on this forum is a courageous and great first step towards getting the help you need. Don’t feel like you need to wait it out - find out your different options and start getting yourself feeling better. Personal experience has taught me, the longer you leave it, the harder it is to get better.

Take care of yourself. I’m always happy to listen and chat if you need sometime to talk to.

Eleanor Rose