Looking for people who understand

[HeyHarlie]

I'm 37 years old. I've struggled with anxiety and depression most of my life. Until 5 years ago I did okay. It was a struggle but I managed to have a life, have friends, go to work, etc. The last 5 years I don't leave my house unless I'm made to. I don't work, I have no friends. I'm just completely alone in this dark hopeless void. I recently started medication and therapy again but feel hopeless like nothing is helping and it'll never get better again. I'm a single mother with 4 children, two who are bi polar which just adds to it. I'm looking for people to talk to who understand and maybe to make some new friends and even eventually who knows.

[Hidden]

Good morning. If you need to vent I’m here.

[HeyHarlie in reply to Hidden]

Good morning! Thank you for the kind words. I wouldn't even know where to start honestly. I feel like a Guinea pig for medications and nothing seems to make me feel better. I wish they had a way to know what medications would work in certain people. It feels hopeless to goop through medication after medication and not feel any different.

[Hidden in reply to HeyHarlie]

What is your diagnosis if you feel comfortable sharing.

[HeyHarlie in reply to Hidden]

Recurrent major depression, agoraphobia, generalized anxiety disorder, panic attack anxiety disorder & ptsd.

[Hidden in reply to HeyHarlie]

Have you tried Remeron and or Seroquel

[HeyHarlie in reply to Hidden]

I've been on seroquel but couldn't take it bc it sedated me too much. I've never been on remeron. I'll have to mention it to my doctor

[Depresseddoglover]

Hey Harlie, we understand you. It must be incredibly difficult being a single mom on top of battling mental illness. I am also 37 and struggling and I don't have any kids. You are a hero! Don't give up on getting better! It often feels hopeless but it's not. Something will work for you. I have been trying various medications and therapies for 20 years. I have good spells and I have bad spells. I recently did DBT therapy which was helpful for a while (until I went off my medication). I can post some of the handouts if you're interested. Feel free to reach out to me to vent any time.

[HeyHarlie in reply to Depresseddoglover]

I'd like that. Anything that might help is appreciated. It's such a struggle to not give up and stop trying. Thank you so much.

[Mumma_h]

Oh you have no idea! I understand way more than I wish I did. I'm a single mum of 4 too and suffered many years alone with this terrible thing called depression,I didn't even know a person could feel that hope less until it happened to me . My heartfelt thoughts are with you , sometimes I wish this site was face to face so I could give you a big hug and help you through,I'd be your friend!😁. Happy to talk privately if you ever want to if you'd like to share more ,not sure how to do it but could figure out . I can tell you I got through it and I'd lost all hope but unbelievably to me I got better. Hit a bad patch yesterday,over my son ,long story ,I posted about it tonight so again I'm in prevention mode ,but I understand your pain and sympathise with you very very much ❤️🌈

[HeyHarlie in reply to Mumma_h]

Thank you. You must definitely understand how difficult this is. Thank you for the medicine recommendation I'll definitely look into it. I'd love to talk privately if we can figure it out. It'd be great to talk to someone who has been exactly where I am right now.

[Mumma_h in reply to HeyHarlie]

I'd be more than happy to talk privately , know what it's like to be in your position and know how awful it is ! If I can give you hope and help in anyway it would make me happy too ❤️when where ready Wel try to msg each other I'm sure we'll figure it out

[HeyHarlie in reply to Mumma_h]

That sounds wonderful. Thank you!

[Mumma_h]

P s. I've tried different medications,and so far for me Ive found escalatopram the best. Different for every one but this medication hasn't caused terrible anxiety like others or bad dreams. I don't like the waiting part (waiting for it to work) but has been worth it❤️. Just a thought if youve been on the same medication a while and you don't feel much change .

[urbetterthanthem]

Sounds like you take on a lot of responsibility taking care of your kids which is admirable..warmline.org is ncie to find people to talk on the phone with and there are a lot of nice people here to chat with...Glad you joined the site..it can be tough to be isolated espeically when you are the kind of person who probably enjoys social interaction

[HeyHarlie in reply to urbetterthanthem]

Thank you so much for the recommendation. It is very isolating dealing with these illnesses. It makes it even more difficult

[HeyHarlie]

Therapy is decent. I feel better temporarily after I leave but, it never last very long.

[LiveandLetLive42]

I'm the same age and literally was agoraphobic up until a year ago. I completely understand the stress, anxiety and depression you are feeling. I finally moved closer to my parents, started new medication, started a new job and I finally am feeling better. I hope you do too! We're all here for you!

[HeyHarlie in reply to LiveandLetLive42]

Thank you, I am trying to move closer to my mom as where I am now kind of further isolates me. Hopefully that will help as well if I can get moved.

[9Aurelius in reply to HeyHarlie]

When you have that much on your plate it’s a real accomplishment just to get through one day.