I have been seeing a therapist for years now. I have gone to multiple, but with each one, no matter how much I like them, there's always a point in time where I feel as though I'm in a rut.
What I mean by that is, I'll have things going on in my life that I would like to talk about, but I'll go to my appointments and feel like I have nothing to say. I've written things down and made lists, but I almost feel like the conversation is forced.
I don't know if I just don't know how to "do" therapy, but does anyone have any tips on how to make my sessions as beneficial as possible? Thanks in advance and I hope you all are enjoying your year so far!
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hitbyasegway
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Sounds like you are partly to blame and the therapist also. I have a wonderful therapist, and I spill my guts to her, she always picks up on when things are not going well in my life. Address your fear and loosen up, you are the one that has to do the work, the therapist can then guide you. I would not trade my therapist for anyone else. I send you courage, strength, belief in self, peace, love & hugs......
Hi, I don't know if I have understand what you mean but I think it's similar to something that usually happens to me.
Sometimes I struggle with things that I know I need help with but I can't speak with my therapist about it because I feel uncomfortable.
So what I do is before my therapy session I go out with a close friend who I can speak about the problem without feeling uncomfortable, and I tell him everything or almost everything (depending of the issue) then, when I go with my therapist, I don't feel uncomfortable telling him about that.
That helps me 95% of the times.
If you think you are in a rut, it's ok, I think you should think about that, tell it to a friend and also with your therapist, maybe he/she can look for a diff way for the therapy session that can still be helpful for you.
Think of the therapist as a car to get to your destination.
The job (unless a specific type of counselling) is not to solve your problems, but guide your thinking. Explore different scenarios or problem solve in areas or feelings where we fear to go.
Often we don't know how we feel about something or exploring the past hurts. The answers to our own questions or feelings (how we feel about it) is the issue with letting go and resolving , so we can move forward in our life without the expectation that same will happen or are stuck.
I went round and round for years wanting something the therapist just couldn't give me.
That was until I met someone who was teaching counselling and asked me what I wanted to achieve from it?
The questions continued until I found I was answering my own questions.
I was asked again....
So you got out of the counselling what you wanted then?
I replied "well no, I didn't?"
It was then explained to me....what I actually wanted was my feelings verified?
It was then the penny dropped....what I wanted out of the sessions I hadn't asked for or known that I had wanted.
This therapist helped me join the dots so I could figure it myself and become more confident and comfortable in making decisions about me and myself (including feelings).
It was then that it was added it took time to build my confidence and so my esteem to move forward.
Sometimes, life makes it harder than it should be.
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