a boring secret/ rare* childhood memory - Anxiety and Depre...

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a boring secret/ rare* childhood memory

torpe profile image
10 Replies

when i was a kid around intermediate school age my dad bought a tape recorder and later my sister and i got a hold of it and started recording songs from our imaginary band…even after we disbanded, i continued on recording songs that came into my head and would listen to back and hear all the band playing in the back and feed the secret world where i was fronting my own band. once my sister grabbed the recorder from my hand after i had just recorded a secret song and played it aloud for the car to hear which made everyone laugh...a nightmare come true, a break in the fourth wall! even now i think of this and smile at the thought that would realistically never happen from lack of talent...i don’t know whether or not i have a nice voice but i really love to sing...i still make recordings although i seldom share them with anyone but my sister but even when i do i regret...it takes so much to share even with those i love most...it’s really embarrassing..i wonder if there’s people that feel free to share such personal parts of their hearts mixed with something they’re so insecure about. all my heart lies in my song... when i make songs i don’t have to think and somehow i know what i want to say and i still hear the music in the back just as well as i would any other song and live in that fake world where i believe in something enough to make it real or to have the throat of a song bird. i have many delusions to pass the time and this one has been around for more than a decade 🥴

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torpe profile image
torpe
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10 Replies
kenster1 profile image
kenster1

nice memories to have never stop believing as they say your probably far better than you make out.

torpe profile image
torpe in reply to kenster1

thank you for saying so...i’ll keep this in my heart until it becomes real to me :)

Don't give up your passion for music. Continue learning and honing your craft. I used to sing very out of tune. But a friend of mine, helped me.

torpe profile image
torpe in reply to

you’re so right about honing...thank you for this encouragement!! the passion won’t go away just yet :)

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye

Some of my best memories of childhood are of my brother and me singing and dancing together for fun and entrainment of friends and family. We were both shy kids but we had this side of ourselves that loved putting on a show.. We both had taken dance and music classes for years and were used to other people watching us. We didn't actually have talent, but we had so much fun. We would dance on the sidewalk in front of our house and cars would honk as they drove by , our Mother was always so embarrassed which we rather liked. I can't dance any more except for chair dancing. Don't give up your pleasures. Pam

torpe profile image
torpe in reply to sweetiepye

that story made my heart smile that is so fun and feels so good and i’m not even the one remembering! it’s all in the fun of it…i also get a kick out of embarrassing my mom even now..the picture of this story is to me a remembrance of the tiny joys in life. thank you so much for sharing this with me :) i will continue on

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to torpe

I am so glad we made you smile. My brother passed on some years ago and this is one of my memories that keeps him close to me. He also loved to make people laugh and smile.

torpe profile image
torpe in reply to sweetiepye

oh my goodness i’m so sorry to hear that....they say the people you love never truly go away because they live on in your heart forever ♥️

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to torpe

Bittersweet

torpe profile image
torpe in reply to sweetiepye

truly so...

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