Make me stop!

[Windyred]

Engaged my recently broken up boyfriend in a conversation today. Which I shouldn’t have. And promised my counselor I wouldn’t do. He has a toxic relationship with his ex which bled into our relationship. I became depressed. He became depressed. She’s highly manipulative and he just lets her keep doing it. I finally couldn’t take it anymore and broke up. Which was good. Texting today was not. But I am realizing I have major control issues. I just want him to acknowledge she’s manipulative and helped cause our breakup. I told him I didn’t trust him not to tell her things about our relationship because he lets her manipulate him. So he got super offended and hurt. It is like this obsession comes over me to make my point and in the end my blood pressure is up and I’ve got hives. Of course he never admitted it. So it was a waste of my time but I couldn’t stop myself. Why can’t I stop these destructive behaviors! Does anyone have some techniques they use to control their reactions to situations until they can think logically?

[Hidden]

It's okay. We are all here for you.

[Want2BHappy3]

Your addicted to the drama. My psychiatrist says there’s such a thing. My boyfriends like that He has a Toxic relationship with his daughter I’ve been sucked into it. But No more too stressful She doesn’t even live here. She’s 5 thousand miles away his parents are also involved. Every name in the book is used. When ever he starts talking her I cut him off. I’ve given my opinion he doesn’t listen so what’s the point? You need to seek counseling to pull away from that. Has hard as it is. Leave him to deal with her himself. She seems to be enjoying the control she has and knows it bothers you. Like I tell my daughter that my grandson dad keeps annoying her as long as he knows she’ll react he’ll keep doing it. Bad or good he’s got her attention just like you and your ex are giving her.

[MRawPR]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. I wish I could give you advice to find a way to manage. All I can say Is that we all have a strong side that can conquer adversity. Be strong and keep away from him if it destroys you. You deserve a person who loves you unconditionally and lives the present with you. Not the past. Hope you feel better soon. Take care. M

[Dolphin14]

I think it's best to bow out gracefully. Your making contact certainly gives them more to talk about.

You have to accept its over. However he lives his life now has nothing to do with you. It shouldn't matter to you if the gf is manipulative. Thats his problem not yours.