How do you deal with the normal stresses in life?

[Bay123]

Stress triggers my anxiety so I really try to reduce it but its unrealistic to say you will have no stress in life. I am a full time student and no matter how prepared I am, there will be some stress. After midterms I fell into this funk and I am trying to pull myself out. I had a horrible panic attack last Friday and I missed a Chemistry lab so now I am stressed out about trying to make it up and am feeling so much anxiety around it I am scared to go to class at all. It feels like I am going crazy sometimes. Like of course all I have to do is go talk to the professor and get it handled but that feels like such a huge task.

[20Voices]

I deal with day to day stresses by breaking down my tasks, making a to do list for each day and building in time so that I can do my stress control techniques. Don't feel guilty that things you do are harder at the moment, just build in extra steps. Your professor, for example, break that down into smaller tasks. Make an appointment to see them, write a list of what you want to talk about so you don't forget. Go to the appointment, take your list to refer to. Maybe take someone with you.

I sometimes even rehearse in my mind what I want to say before I go to meetings.

This is some of what I do, hope it helps.

[Bay123 in reply to 20Voices]

Thank you. I think breaking it down might help a lot actually. It just feels so huge because everything is piling.

[20Voices in reply to Bay123]

It will do. Write down what you have to do, then take each task and break them down into smaller tasks. Even think about who can help you with each task. Put realistic time frames on everything as well. Do something every day and score it off the list. If you think you are not going to meet deadlines then go and talk to someone who can help you.

Don't be scared your professors want you to do well, but they can't help if you don't talk to them. Even if they won't help then find someone else. How do I know this? I know this because my sister was a principal teacher in her department and through friends of friends she'd heard a complaint about a student struggling. She told this friend to tell their friend that the teachers couldn't help if the students didn't tell them they were struggling. That student spoke to their teacher and with help passed their exams. I hope this helps you.

[Bay123 in reply to 20Voices]

I know that they usually do want to help and I’m actually the type of student to go to office hours pretty regularly. This particular professor is not a very nice person and unfortunately because it’s a lab, he is the only person who can help me. I don’t know if I’m upset because it’s a shitty situation or if my anxiety is making it feel more stressful than it actually is. It feels like I’m going to lose my last control over everything if this doesn’t go well.

[PacTedBud]

I am currently a full time college student as well so I fully understand the stress of being a student and everything else that goes along with it. I also make tons of lists. I have a calander made for the month of all of the assignments that are due and then I make lists of the assignments I need to do for each day. After each task I take a highlighter and mark over the task that I have completed. I do not make my lists very long for each day, I make sure to set time aside for each tasks as well as take breaks every 30 minutes. Once you are finished with all of your tasks and have seen the highlighted areas I tend to feel a sense of relief from my anxiety. I also understand having anxiety when talking to a professor, so maybe instead of setting up an appointment, maybe just simply send them an email explaining how you are feelings, see if they will give you an overview of the class sessions. Or if you have any friends in that class you could talk to them about what was discussed in class the day you missed. You could also see if there is a counselng center on your campus that you could go to to talk about what you are feeling and they can give you some stress relief techniques and reccomendations.

[Bay123 in reply to PacTedBud]

Im a list maker too. It’s the only way to keep track of it all with my brain fog! I have sent him and email and he isn’t responding. Unfortunately part of the reason why I’m so nervous is that he isn’t a very nice man. I talking with a friend who has had his class in the past about my going to talk to him and she let me know about her experience with him. She expressed to him that she was feeling stressed and anxious and he made some inappropriate and rude comments about mental health to her. I don’t want to lie about why I missed class and I’m also worried he’s is going to be a jerk and I’m a little sensitive right now. Honestly I’m not sure how to handle it.

[PacTedBud in reply to Bay123]

I am sorry that I am just now seeing this, I am new to this support group. One thing you could do since you do not feel comfortable with that particular professor, is if you have another professor that you feel comfortable talking to. You could go to that professor and tell them your concerns and they may give you some advice on how to approach the difficult professor. If that is not an option, you could try a different professor within that area and speak with them about your concerns. When I have had professors I do not feel comfortable talking with, I will go to a professor I feel comfortable talking to. You may even try going to the counseling center and ask for advice. You could also maybe see if a friend or someone wil go with you to talk to this said professor. If you feel this uncomfortable around this professor you should let someone know about your worries, especialy if he is making several students feel uncomfortable. Also I do not think lying about why you missed class is a good idea, you should be honest. That may be difficult if he reacts in a negative way, he just may not be suffering from mental health issues like most people do. How I deal with day to day stress I tend to do yoga sometimes since I hold a lot of stress in my shoulders, I go on fast- paced walks, but honeslty I just watch a lot of Netflix.

[Bay123 in reply to PacTedBud]

Hey thanks for the advice! It actually went okay talking with him. He didn’t want too many details and was only mildly rude haha. I think my anxiety just took over for a couple days and my everyday obstacles that are usually manageable felt a lot bigger. It’s a good reminder to stay on top of my stress management.

[silliesalamander]

I'm so sorry you are experiencing this stress. I have just recently gotten a job and I go to school so I am so stressed a lot of the time. But I use my coping mechanisms and they get me through it. I hope this helps or brings comfort.

[kvolm2016]

Hi Bay123, I saw your comment about being nervous about talking with the Chem professor since others have shared their negative experiences. If talking with him directly is too much to handle at this point, it might be helpful to talk with the department chair and ask that person to advise you on how to proceed.

It is great that you have been primarily able to handle the routine stresses of being a full-time student! Most schools have support services for students with identified needs. Are you familiar with the services your campus offers and/or do you make use of these services?

[Bay123 in reply to kvolm2016]

I haven’t explored the campus services. I’m a little new to this. Most my life the anxiety hasn’t been too bad.

[kvolm2016 in reply to Bay123]

Glad to hear that you have been fortunate to not struggle significantly so far. I would bet some of what you are experiencing now will naturally lessen with time as you get acclimated to the campus environment, expectations and routines. I would definitely find out about both the mental health and educational support services that your campus offers. Even if you never decide to use them, it would be good to know what is available and what resources you might have if needed. That is why they are there!

Were you able to have a successful interaction with the Chem professor or get that resolved in another way?

[UkyoCoanccy]

I am exactly like you. Something similar happened to me once so I preferred to send an email to my teacher. I explained my situation. He was very comprehensive.I hope you find a solution. Hugs and luck.

[masane]

i think you are experiencing stress anxiety triggered by school which is normal but with more severity. have you spoke with your teachers or a school counselor? i did and they gave me reasonable accommodations for test taking