how do you deal with this

[lostgal]

How does a person stop feeling sad, overwhelmed and generally hopeless. This feeling has stuck with me for almost all my life. I feel like a failure, ugly, unloved, outcast and am not able to fit in with the society. How do I stop feeling this shallow and hollow? The fact that I have gained weight even makes it worse. Jeez! I have never felt this ugly and alone in a very long time. How do I start making friends? I sit in my house alone the whole day Monday to Monday. I know all the holes there are on my walls. I would rather look at the wall alone than go out and meet people.

Meeting people makes me shake. I mean, I literally shake like I am having a panic attack. I have cut everybody from my life coz sometimes I feel they are way far ahead of me, or I don’t know, I am just not good with people. I don’t go anywhere.

I am alone. I don’t know what to do. I can’t work. A lot of unfished work is still lying on my computer. You see, working at home even makes it worse. Coz, I can’t finish my work, I can’t concentrate and I have already received three warnings of being fired if I don’t improve. I try, I really do, but I can’t just keep up. It makes me stressed even more. I mean, I am 24 I need to be working and taking care of my bills like everybody at my age is doing.

I am ashamed of saying this, but bathing everyday is a burden to me. I mean, I cant bathe and brush my teeth and take care of my hair the same day.

I cant wash utensils, do laundry and wash the house on the same day. It feels like too much work to do on the same day and honestly, I don’t have the strength to do.

How do I get out from this hole. How do people do it.

[Hidden]

Hi there, once the downward spiral sets in it takes a lot of energy to start the climb upward. I wish I could tell you a pill will fix it, but it won’t. Medication can take the edge off, but there is still a lot of work that you will have to do for yourself. I recommend you listen to Douglas Bloch on YouTube. He has a lot of firsthand experience with clinical depression and survival. You also may need to be admitted to a psych hospital for a while to get you back on your feet in the right direction.

[deborah27]

It's a bit of a 'catch 22' situation, the more you avoid things the harder it becomes and the harder things become, the more you avoid.It is reality that at some point you need to break the circle. You may need support to do this, a feel the fear and do it anyway strategy. It is clearly really getting you down, can you reach out to someone to help you? I

[b1b1b1]

If you take a shower every other day, that is OK. It is best to brush your teeth at least once a day and comb your hair. You need not wash your hair every day. I think a therapist and/or a psychiatrist would be very helpful. You are too young to be in this sad state. See if you can try to find one. xx

[lostgal]

There’s only one problem. In my country most psych hospitals will only admit mad people. I know I am not mad.

The few I have seen will only give me a few sleeping pills and a couple of injections and send me home. My mum, on the other hand, doesn’t understand depression, though I live on my own. She thinks I am just lazy and seeking attention.

It is sad that I am really on my own and I don’t see any help coming my way any time soon.

[nightingale1977]

Depression is hard. It makes simple task like waking up in the morning the most exhausting task. I can understand how you feel. But how about for a moment think you are actually a nice person? A person who is sensitive and aware of how much you are in touch with your own emotions? Yes, there might be a possibility of you having a depression but that doesn’t change you as a person. Depression is a mental illness and very little you can do to take it away with a snap of your fingers. Worth considering to get yourself diagnose or check. Talk to a doctor or Counselors to help you find the triggers and perhaps work out various coping mechanisms for you. You can live a fulfilling life. All you need to do is to reach out. Keeping you in my prayer. God bless...

[lorianxiety]

Hi Lostgirl,seems like your in a vicious circle with no contacts to ease your pain.I think you need to talk to someone and see if you need anti-depressants,though I feel the main source of your problem is social interaction,as you said you feel worse trying to cope with the workload plus your own personal needs. I have been in a similar situation when younger and here I am advising or trying to in my senior years.Believe that you can find a solution and its never easy;maybe writing things down would help ,like an every day diary.,some sort of organised way of what you should prioritise.Try not to worry too much regarding ,what you cant do ,just try and cope with one thing at a time .hopefully,you will let us know how things go and as a matter of interest still coping ,Just.Alone…..its early days for you too so try not being hypercritical about what you cant achieve.,and concentrate on what you can!!!!

[Roxylox55]

I know I'm late to your post but I just do what I have the energy to do on a given day Whatever you feel able for. Our energy is down when we're feeling a bit low. If yoy just get two tasks or maybe even one on each day, well done. Don't overtax yourself.

[SeekingPeace1]

It sounds like you've got depression and social anxiety. Its best to see a psychotherapist (for counselling and coaching you through this) and a psychiatrist (to prescribe anti-depressant medication) and get it treated immediately before it becomes worse.

Its ok to take anti-depressants for a while just to enable you to get your life back on track. Then you can wean off the medication after a few months.

Look up "SSRI" - these anti-depressants take about 6 weeks to start working but if you get the one right for you then you definitely start to feel better and will be able to function normally again.

I know exactly what you're going through because I was the exact same. Unfortunately I wasn't able to get help in time and now have to be on meds all the time. Don't wait any longer - go get help immediately and correct your life fast - in terms of socializing, getting set in a job you like and finding a good partner. Then you won't have anything to feel depressed or anxious about.