wishing i could turn my brain off & realizing life will always be harder for me

[misselim]

((to specify - i have clinical depression, anxiety, and psychosis. my official diagnosis is unspecified bipolar.))

i just ended a long term relationship on not so great terms. i know most everyone has gone through this. i also know that my illnesses only exacerbates how i feel right now.

i go to a school with mainly women around my age (teens/twenties) and they were there to comfort me, because they know how it feels. as hard as i try their advice doesn’t help me. they don’t realize simple things like “go out and meet new people” causes me a lot of distress and i cannot handle something like that.

i wish i could just turn my brain off. i wish especially in times like this that my mental illness would just leave me alone until i got over it. i wish i could just sleep for an indefinite amount of time until i feel better. though i know that is not possible.

does anyone know of a place where i can vent? i don’t want to bombard this app and this board. i want somewhere i can talk to people and let them know. i appreciate this app specifically because all of us have experienced illness. i feel like the interactions i have here are typically more genuine because of our shared experience.

thank you for reading my post and for any replies : )

[Mary-intussuception]

Sorry for what you're going through.

🌹🌹🌹

[misselim in reply to Mary-intussuception]

i’ll be okay : )

i wish you the best !

[froggymom88]

Have you tried meditation to alleviate the thoughts? You can even try repeating a short positive statement like ,all will be well. If you like music listen to calming music and do deep breath exercises. You will be OK and it'e fine to post here often.

[misselim in reply to froggymom88]

i’ve tried laying down with no distractions but i always end up over thinking. i’ve had nightmares so i cannot turn to sleep either. when i listen to music i cry. thats why i feel so helpless.

thank you though : )

[froggymom88 in reply to misselim]

Try saying positive uplifting statements to yourself and repeat them often. Pick music that is upbeat. Maybe watch a comedy show or movie that you like.

[misselim in reply to froggymom88]

will, do. thank you