Hi, everybody. I feel a strong call to ministry in the Unitarian church, but, after having a panic attack while preaching, I'm starting to wonder if this is really for me. How will I be able to lead a large congregation if I'm always dealing with my own anxiety and depression issues? Will my anxiety get in the way of doing what needs to be done for the good of everyone? These are just some thoughts going through my mind. I don't want my anxiety to shatter my dreams or sense of calling, but it's a worry for me.
Questioning My Career Path: Hi... - Anxiety and Depre...
Questioning My Career Path
If this is what you want to do - DO IT.
You are fallible and human - you cannot be perfect but that doesn’t mean you won’t be able to do this job. If anything, the fact you have your own struggles makes you more personable and will make you more relatable to your congregation. You are likely to feel anxious and it’s understandable after suffering a panic attack that you feel uncertain but it may never happen again. Sometimes you may have to prioritise your own needs and that’s ok, we all need to do that sometimes.
I have a career which means I am in front of people a lot and have to put others needs first when at work. I have to care for people and I am reminded everyday that my job does ‘matter’. It’s daunting but rewarding - there have been days when I’ve panicked and days I’ve felt like I can’t do it but I’m glad I’ve stuck at it. One of the best things I ever did, was confide in a close colleague about some of my struggles - it’s so nice to know someone will support me at work if I need it.
Believe in yourself. If this is where you feel you should be - go for it!
Have you ever studied discernment of spirits? It could help you answer the questions you are asking if ministry is the path you are called to.
My personal theological beliefs are that not all ideas that enter into the human mind come from good or evil spirits; however, I do think it is possible that certain signs come from God. When I was a baby, I almost died from Meconium Aspiration Syndrome, but my mom prayed and promised God that, if I survived, she would raise me in the church. I can testify with utmost honesty that she did not push me in that direction, and she never told me that story until long after I had a desire to go into ministry. I feel like that is probably a sign that this is my calling, but then again, I look at my anxiety, and sometimes I have doubts.