Coming to terms with myself.

[Lost1980]

Hello everyone, this is my first post, and my this is hard for me.

I have struggled with so much depression and anxiety my whole life. When I was young I used to think it just sadness and my reaction to bullying. As I gotten the feeling of self disgust, and worthlessness and self hatered never faded.

I always just delt with it by myself. Rarely ever talked to anyone about it. Till now with recent events in my life. My father passed away last moth and I been running so ragged to help my loved ones. I’ve been having to come to terms with the fact that I can not keep going the way I have been my whole life.

Since I’ve been trying to face my depression head the last few weeks it’s been harder to function with everything going on.

I’m going talk to my doctor for the first time about it this month. I’ve always been afraid to face this.

Sorry for the long post. Thank you to anyone who sees this

[gerg]

Welcome,

I hope that you have a productive visit with your doctor.

[Lost1980 in reply to gerg]

Thank you

[snow_queen]

I’m glad you’re here!

I also used to always keep my emotions in and never ask anyone for help or talk about how I was feeling. I would subconsciously “put it in a box” but the problem is that issues don’t go away when you put them in a box, they just pile up and come back later. I still use it as a coping mechanism but now I make a conscious effort to come back to the feelings/problems I put away and deal with them properly.

Try to just take it one step at a time. Talking to your doctor about depression is definitely good, and i also find it helpful to reach out to friends even if I’m not talking to them about mental health issues. Best of luck!!

[Lost1980 in reply to snow_queen]

Thank you snow_queen. I hope someday to be able to learn how to deal with my emotions properly

[snow_queen in reply to Lost1980]

Anytime I’m definitely not perfect at it yet and probably never will be but I think one of the most important things is realizing that you can turn to people and they do care

[Hidden]

I'm glad you're here too! I can relate to a lot of your feelings I'm probably a lot older than you and still have those feelings and still coming to terms with it it's a lifelong thing for me have had these issues since I was a kid. So I completely relate and feel so bad for you. And I'm so glad that you're reaching out I think that is a huge thing and I wish you well on your path! 💜