An Update: Visiting Memories

[DistressedPoe]

So today, right now, I feel better. Happier. I suppose the sadness still lingers but I'm calm !! There was this jar of messages my friends made me for my birthday with little notes telling me why they love me and our special memories. That felt good to read. They even sent me funny videos!

It felt like I was back home again. I had my Polaroids scattered on the table with the messages, i had my favourite songs playing, it felt great ! I got sad because I really do miss it and because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't muster up a genuine laugh. Though I did feel lighter and happier than usual. It felt nice to feel like my old self for a bit and be reminded of a time where while I was anxious, I was stronger and happier and had a great support system that I still do. They've never ignored my frantic messages once and are helping so much. I'm so grateful for them.

I really want things to go back to the way they were before. And I genuinely do miss being back home. And it hurts that I'm not really enjoying time with my family but I tried so hard, y'know ? I love them so much. The first two months. I barely touched my phone. Now I can't handle it. But I'm getting through. I'm trying to feel better. Less anxious. I feel like I'm slipping into depression but I'm trying my best not to. It's not anyone but this situation and environment. But I'm trying to remind myself that I'm still strong. I'm still the same old me. I just need to stop falling prey to my thoughts.

Let's see how it goes. 5 months. 5 more months. Just thought I'd update !

[kkat37]

Thanks for the update! You are strong and you can do this! You can make it and get better and better everyday depression will not win against you. Beautiful picture love the colors!

[DistressedPoe in reply to kkat37]

Thank youuuuu ❤️❤️❤️ you too ! I'm sure whatever it is you're fighting, you will overcome it. We all will together.

And thank you. I have my friends to thank for that ahahhaha

[kkat37 in reply to DistressedPoe]

Thank you so much! Yes we can do this!! We are stronger than we think.

Awesome friends you have!

[grebedz in reply to kkat37]

I'm glad, even for what it is worth as a stranger, that you have awesome friends like that that get together to help you feel loved in whichever way they can.

[DistressedPoe in reply to grebedz]

Thank you @ both of you. Yes I'm very grateful for them and love them dearly. They're like family.

We always do these kinds of things for each other's birthdays and stuff. They never fail to make me feel loved. I honestly hope everyone finds friends like these.