unable to sustain relationships

[childofomelas]

my depression and insecurities prevent me from developing and sustaining relationships of all kinds. I can’t talk to family, most of my friends only last a year and change every new school year, i’m talking to someone but i feel like they deserve better and i’ll only bring them down. i’m unable to share a lot about myself and they’re very open so i already see issues forming based on a few of our deeper conversations. i feel like i should cut them off before they become too attached ?

[gerg]

There is only one person that we can actually control, ourselves. If we stop trying to control others then they may choose to become (and stay) attached. This is a difficult skill to learn, but it is well worth the effort.

[Kat63]

I wish you felt better about yourself. I know how that can make you hesitant about relationships with other people.

[gerg in reply to Kat63]

Many times how we feel about ourselves is greatly influenced by how we perceive that others view us. This is a big part of the control that I mentioned. Our perception is is usually more incorrect than not, but we still suffer the pain. To be in control is to give up that control.