Relationships and Depression

[EJ7215]

Over the past couple of months, it seems like all of my friends are getting engaged or married. I love them all and I couldn't be happier for them. I know it's a bit selfish but even though I'm happy for them, it's also making me feel worse about myself. I've struggled to find and form romantic relationships my entire life. I've had 1 "serious" relationship but I wasn't happy in it and it ended in March. I've also been dealing with depression for the past few years, which started getting a lot worse a month ago. I know it's not right to compare myself to others but seeing everyone around me getting engaged and married makes me feel almost like I'm being left behind or not where I want to be in life. It's peaking my anxiety and it just makes me feel like s**t. Anyone have any suggestions on how to work through this feeling? I just want to be happy for my friends without doubting and questioning myself.

[Hidden]

U can be happy for ur friends,but what about ur happiness!?Remember..the grass isnt always greener on the other side.

Focus on u n ur happiness because being the best for urself will attract a healthy future relationship.

[EJ7215 in reply to Hidden]

You are right I need to focus on my happiness. Just seems difficult sometimes

[Hidden in reply to EJ7215]

Totally get it.surround urself with positive people n it will make it easier

[Hidden]

I kinda get what you mean. always struggled with relationships and i’ve only had one serious romantic relationship but wasn’t happy in it. I often feel im being left behind as an adult even if im happy for others success. yes, it’s not good to compare yourself but also it also helps to realize that there’s no time limit on when you should get married or have kids. all you can do is your best, keep doing that while you take care of yourself and you’ll find your version of success and happiness. you also dont have to get married or have kids if you dont want.

[EJ7215 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, I appreciate the encouraging words. I guess you are right there is no time limit. I didnt think about that

[FearIsALiar]

Wow, reading this made me feel like I was reading my own thoughts! I know the feeling but just know everyone is on a different path!

How old are you?

[EJ7215 in reply to FearIsALiar]

Its kind of comforting to know im not alone feeling this way. Im 26

[FearIsALiar in reply to EJ7215]

Yeah you’re definitely not alone!

[Sunrise321]

Same here.. I have all the same thoughts you are having, all the time. Except I am now 57. Never been married, and seldom date. Cannot connect with any woman for a relationship, and I've pretty much given up. NO CONNECTION - EVER. It just doesn't work, as there is no one out there who is compatible with me, mentally. For most people, finding a match is a very simple thing. It just happens. For others, like us... it's a BIT more of a struggle. But here are a few things to look at: Over 50% of the couples out there are unhappy and do not like their partner. Divorce rate is over 50%. For people like us, it still could happen at any time.. you never know. I don't care if I'm 70 when I find that woman. And if it doesn't ever happen, we just make the best of our lives and figure there are much worse situations to be in.

[Shadowofme]

Hi! I am not sure how to work through this but I get it. I am tired to watching my friends get engaged and then attending their weddings alone or with one of my girlfriends while everyone else is in a successful relationship. I am no sad but I have given up on looking for love. Especially because every time I open up to someone it comes back to bite me and I am sad again. So if you figure out how to cope please share your tips with me too please!

[EJ7215 in reply to Shadowofme]

If I find any tips outside of what is on this thread I will absolutely share. I've been burned many times too but I haven't given up on finding love. I just stopped actively searching. When it happens it happens I guess.

[Brielle-White]

hey sweets, i can understand what you are going through.. and this really happens when you see other getting along with their partners and celebrating and how their life changes.. but you know there is a special time for everybody.. just because people are getting engaged doesn't makes you left behind of anything.. the day you find yourself a person worth investing your love and life, you are going to get all that you see others having too. Its just a matter of right time and a little over-thinking that's probably making you think like that..

you have a lot of stuff to do in the place right now.. explore yourself, pamper yourself.. invest in yourself at the moment.. learn and explore. Every stage of life has so much of its own before you move on to another stage... and that is the part and beauty of life.. live every situation.. and wait for the best

and are you in to any therapy or treatment for anxiety and depression ? this is a big reason your thought pattern is disrupted..