So this Saturday, there’s a fairly big family gathering for my mum’s 70th birthday. I have anxiety disorder and IBS, so you can imagine how I’m feeling about this party. There will be 15 of us and we’re having a fancy lunch in a lovely hotel, then back to mum’s for the rest of the afternoon and evening.
I hate eating out. I find it impossible to eat - I’m also allergic to wheat and my IBS demands that I eat a really bland diet. I went with mum to look at their menus and they don’t have a dedicated gluten free menu, but they say they can “adapt” things to any dietary requirements. I told the staff that I needed compete reassurance that my meal would be prepared in a different area of the kitchens to the other food. I was given reassurances. But I’m just dreading it. I’m terrified actually. I absolutely dread being caught out by eating something the triggers my allergy or IBS. And being anxious also just makes that work.
My mum is quite controlling and organised all this herself. My sister and I don’t get along and she is equally bossy and controlling. She and my mum have both lost a lot of weight and look like clones of each other. I’m going to turn up like the flabby sister. I just don’t want to go. But my two daughters (late teens) are excited about it and my husband will support me. But it’s all I can think about.
What if I feel overwhelmed and just have to go home? What if my IBS plays up and I have to leave? 😞😞