Man am I truly lonely. This new person I know of is attractive to me. I want to get to the person but damn I'm truly bad at flirting. Not just flirting... it gets better. I'm worse at speaking. I can't pronunciate correctly and it always gets to me. I just want to at least become this persons friend.
Every person that I've ever liked I've had to unfortunately stop liking because I never can get to them. I stutter and say things wrong and I can never speak up and I'm always shy. And sometimes I come off rude when really I wanna get to know you as much and I'm so interested in who you are.
I'm a wreck. Can someone give me tips? I want to actually have a friend. Or am I too weird? I know I'm a weird kid but I'm nearly an adult now. This needs to stop. Sigh. Social anxiety is tough.
Its hard to give tips. Most of the things we think in anxiety and depression states is irrational and in our negative thoughts only. I'd love to be your friend.
I have social anxiety too, you are not alone. Being shy isn't necessarily a bad thing, some people might think you're cute or be happy that someone is shy about talking to them. Weird is based on the norm, and in my opinion what's so bad about not being normal? If you never give it a try you will never know what would have happened, which is worse than trying and failing. Anxiety is resistance to something so the best way is to lean in to the resistance than push against it. You can tell them honestly, I'm really interested in getting to know you, but my anxiety makes it hard to talk sometimes, can you bear with me? If it doesn't work out, you can be satisfied that you tried your best. I know it is hard, anxiety isn't a pleasant experience, but as you get further and further out of your comfort zone, you will only get more and more comfortable around people.
Practice practice practic. When I hear stories like this, I refer people to the story of Dr. Albert Ellis. When he was young, he had such a strong anxiety about approaching women but eventually he cured himself. Read up on him, it is fascinating! Click on the link below: bit.ly/2xaou0h
In my experience I’ve found that the guys I felt like I needed to flirt with in order to get their attention were not even worth my time in the end. I never really felt like I could be myself around them. The flirting was just an act to get their attention and it was too much trouble to keep them interested beyond that. They were shallow.
But the ones that were worth getting to know more were the ones who I could feel comfortable being myself with. I could chat, joke, and just be friendly with them.
If we were friendly at that point and I thought that there might be a chance they could be interested as well, I’d probably smile more, throw a couple coy looks when joking with them, or maybe do just a little more eye contact. I’d be very subtle though.
With me, sometimes even then it just didn’t quite click one way or another. That’s okay though because I figured it was good practice for me to have worked on not being so shy around people anyway.
Not sure if any of this is helpful to you.
Just remember that it’s important to be yourself. I doubt you’re any more weird then the next Jane Doe or Joe Shmoe.
Me—I’m a self proclaimed dork and at this point in my like, proud of it. Ha!😁
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The Dumbest Advice I've Ever Gotten to Get Over Being Shy
Why am i like this
Why am I wrong?
At my breaking point.
