What's wrong with me?

[comb]

I'm alone for what seems like the first time in weeks. I'm having a lot of trouble keeping it together. All of a sudden I feel like flipping out and like I'm having borderline tendencies. Idk I want to self harm and sit in the shower to see if I can feel something.

[Needcakegirl]

Don’t.... I feel you, but plz don’t harm yourself .

[Needcakegirl]

Please share what happened to get you to the point of feeling this way....

[comb in reply to Needcakegirl]

I went to this concert earlier this week that triggered my ptsd. Ever since then I've been feeling the part of my brain shut down. It's like it can only focus on the trauma. It's bringing up all these very strange feelings of denial and even lust. I was sexually assaulted four years ago and I’ve been thinking more about pressing charges. I feel really lost and isolated in it right now.

[Needcakegirl in reply to comb]

I’m so sorry to hear of this and your pain...good you recognize your trigger. Distract yourself with a movie u like, some chocolate, something. MEANWHILE, have you shared the incident with at least a close friend or relative? If not, plz at least tell someone near you because you will need a support system physically with you sooner than later. classmate, coworker, local hospital/church/shelter/ local police... you’ll have to fill out a report and speak with someone. U can try requesting to speak with a female first if that makes you more comfortable. Also, keep talking to us and/or call a number to help guide you thru this process. Here’s one 1 [phone] (SAFE). This is east coast , so I’m not sure where you are but it should help.

[Sillysausage234 in reply to comb]

🕊x

[aaronm]

How are you feeling this morning? Hopefully better?

[comb in reply to aaronm]

thanks for asking. I had a weird dream last night and realized I’m dealing with a lot of rage. I feel less consumed by it this morning but it kind of feels like I’ve been injured and today i feel weak. But I didn’t self-harm and that’s a point for me! Hopefully today goes better

[aaronm in reply to comb]

That is a point or ten points. What are your plans today? Hopefully you can get outside to soak up some sun.

[comb in reply to aaronm]

Just took the dog on a long walk. Might sit at a cafe for a bit. It’s a nice day today.