anxiety/ocd after drinking

A few nights ago, my roommates and I got really drunk. I know that drinking gives me very bad anxiety the day after, so I haven't drank in almost 3 months (besides a few drinks here and there). I live with 3 girls, and it was just us for the entire night. we had a great night, from what I can remember. I woke up feeling extremely sick (hungover) but also so anxious that I had done something terribly wrong. I keep thinking what if I cheated on my boyfriend (which is impossible...again, I live with all girls and I passed out first). But my mind keeps bringing me back to the what ifs...

I have been like this in the past. I've been doing a lot of research and it sounds alot like OCD. I have had it so bad that I thought I did horrible things like hurting somebody else or doing hardcore drugs in a black out... There is never evidence to these things, but my mind always thinks like this the next day.

I am the nicest, funniest and most energetic person when I am drinking. I have never in my life been in a physical fight, never have I cheated on my boyfriend, never have I done something illegal/done drugs... I don't know why I think that I am such a bad person when I drink and can't remember what i did!! Everybody always tells me how fun I am to be around when I am drunk (including my boyfriend) but for some reason I always think the worst case scenarios and work myself up so much that I have panic attacks. Does anybody else ever feel like this?

I know that I need to just cut out drinking all together because it makes me feel so bad afterwards, but I am in college and its hard. I used to drink 4-5x a week, and have dramatically cut back in the last year or two due to anxiety and finally getting my life together (LOL) but I just want to be able to have a fun girls night and not worry so much the next day. Although I try to limit myself, I have times where I just keep drinking because I am having fun and it turns into a black out that I can't help (not often anymore). ugh. My roommates said I was so fun and they reassured me that I did nothing wrong, but i just keep thinking what if they aren't telling me something or what if I texted somebody I shouldn't have and deleted it and now i will never know?! ugh i know, typing this sounds so stupid but it's annoying!!!!

[Charliie1994]

Hey , I got so drunk on saterday , was sick when I got home , then yesterday ( the day after ) woke up feeling literally terrible , so dizzy , sick , aching all over , then the anxiety kicked in . It’s so horrible , my heart races , chest is so tight , can’t breathe properly , negative thoughts... so I went to bed struggling with all of these symptoms , woke up many times in the night feeling the same and now , ( Monday ) my heart is still beating loudly and my chest is tight still . And all of this because I drank too much , If i hadn’t of drank I wouldn’t be in this state now . But then I cant but think there is something wrong with me ? Argh it’s so tiring . Hope you are ok x

[Lisau2]

Hi Cam,

I definately notice that I am more anxious after having more than 1-2 drinks. When my brain is in an anxious state, I think all kinds of "what's if's " too, which then make me MORE anxious.

For me, it's not worth it for a night of drinking, to feel that anxious for the next few days, so I try not to drink anymore. I am a long time from being out of college though, so I know it must be harder not to have a night of drinking with your roomates.

In my case, I've replaced the drinking with water areobics and swimming, but I think any exercise will help with anxiety. I've also been trying a few meditation classes. Now I have alternative ways to deal with the anxiety. I guess it's just a matter now of choices. I can choose to drink, knowing how it will affect me, or I can choose a healthier activity.

Good luck with your journey🤗

[kenster1]

I go out every couple of weeks for a few beers and just play pool.even although I no I got home safe and sound im still questioning myself for days just incase I might have forgotten something.just wondering if you take medication because that will impair your tolerance to alcohol.some folk can actually have an alcohol allergy or some just cant handle to much drink.i think im all of them but I still do it from time to time.

[Hidden in reply to kenster1]

no medications. I used to think blacking out was completely normal. Like I used to black out ALL of the time when I was younger. And I have always gotten drunk very quickly so I just feel that my body doesn't handle alcohol correctly at this point

[kenster1]

going out in bigger groups as well can be hard if you buy rounds it feels like you drink more I tend to buy my own and be in control more.i don't drink spirits or anything just a few beers.taking your time and eating in between helps as well.

[OptimismandHope]

Hi, I really applaud you for being so honest and so real. That is not always easy. I get that you are in college, that drinking is social, is fun, makes you funny and energetic. But for you, it doesn't stop there. It sounds like it increases your anxiety by A LOT, makes you feel worse afterwards, and has you driving yourself nuts about what you might have said or did. And if you are blacking out a lot, you are ingesting a good amount of alcohol. Maybe you should consider cutting back, only you know what that should look like. Maybe it should just be a couple of drinks and that's it. Maybe it's one drink, one full glass of water, then another drink, then another glass of water....whatever it takes to help you so that you don't feel as bad as you have. It may also be worth thinking about some other things to do besides drinking that would make you feel good. I am sure you are funny and positive even when you are drinking! You are absolutely not a bad person but you have to strike a happy medium where you can be ok and have a lot less anxiety. Since you are at college, you can also talk to a counselor at school and it can be private. Take care of yourself.

[pink83737]

Sadly I can’t drink on my antidepressants