Please help!

[JS1981]

I have dealt with depression my whole life and have been doing quite well lately. Most of my family also suffers from depression, anxiety, or some other form of mental disorder. I am asking for advice today for my brother. His wife of 9 years and the love of his like (or so he thought) has kicked him to the curb like yesterday’s trash. I invited him into my home to try to help him out, he’s taking it really hard. Lately he has started cutting himself. He comes into the house all bloodied up and it’s starting to scare my wife and 4 year old son. Not to mention a number of other terrible decisions that could put us all at risk. My wife wants him out but I couldn’t do that to him. I’ve tried talking to him, I’ve tried showing him some tough love. I don’t know what to do. I would appreciate some advice here but if it’s the same old exercise and diet talk, no thanks. Don’t mean to be rude but we’re both well aware of the diet and exercise talk and it doesn’t help. TIA

[Hidden]

If he's hurting himself you could 302 him, then maybe he can get the help his needs so badly right now. I have 2 daughters who cut, it's a terrible thing to watch as a parent, I really feel for you. My heart goes out to you & him. I'm here for you & will help in any way I can! Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!

[JS1981 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much for the reply. I’m not sure what 302 is but I’m assuming it’s the place where they take you against your will and stick you in a room not too much unlike jail. If that’s the case, he’s been there a few times and it really does nothing but make him angry. I don’t blame him, it’s a terrible place, I’ve had to pick him up there before. He sees counselors, takes medications, and has family close who care about him.

[Hidden in reply to JS1981]

Do you think he has a fit with his therapist? That is so important. He really needs to be totally open & honest to get through this. I really wish you the best. To see your child hurting is so painful. love, peace, light, joy & hugs!

[JS1981 in reply to Hidden]

I’m sure it’s not a good fit but it’s what the VA provides. He can’t really afford much else

[Hidden in reply to JS1981]

Oh I know the VA is terrible. I have to sons who served. I wish you the best. Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!

[Agora1]

HS1981, I feel your brother needs more than diet and exercise talk. He needs to talk with a professional in order to keep him safe as well as your family. The self harm he displays must be very concerning to your 4 y.o. son. A professional will be able to advise you as to the best direction to take in helping your brother, after all he has been through a life changing event in his marriage. Right now your love and support may keep him afloat but his safety and yours needs to be addressed. You're a good brother.

[BonnieSue]

Hi JS,

How is your brother doing now? If the same, his medication isn't doing its job. I hope his medical doctor is working hard to get it right, but it would be good if you're in the loop and aware of this need. What if his doc ISN'T trying to get the meds more effective? That would need to be addressed asap. Your brother is in no shape right now to monitor this problem adequately. Would he allow you to come with him to his app'ts.? Someone else, maybe? Tell him this would be just until his meds are successfully adjusted. You need to also assess whether this doc is up to the task.

I'm very sorry that your brother is doing so poorly and I hope that improves quickly. You're all in my prayers.

Hugs, Love, and Blessings...

[JS1981 in reply to BonnieSue]

Hello BonnieSue. He seems to be doing better for the most part. Since the last incident nothing bad has happened. At least not that I know of. His doctor is a VA doctor and they couldn’t care less about him. It’s a big problem here in Arizona. He’s working on getting a new one but it’s difficult. Thank you for your concern and prayers. Have a great evening.