Saying the wrong things: This morning... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Saying the wrong things

ronnellstc profile image
8 Replies

This morning as my boyfriend and I were sitting on the couch, I felt like he was being distant or that something was wrong. So I asked if he was mad at me or mad that I had not left for work yet. I have been going in early to work a majority of the time, but was not feeling it today, so i planned to leave at my normal time. This made him upset, that I would even think that he was mad i had not left yet.

I know one of my biggest issues is irrational thoughts. I seem to focus on the smallest detail and take it to the biggest extreme. He has told me i write novels in my head , and that i need to relax and not worry so much, but it can be very hard for me not to worry, and focus on that small issues. it come be the tone of his voice, the way he moved, anything and i think the worst of it. I am trying my best not to do this.

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ronnellstc profile image
ronnellstc
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8 Replies
hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Men are from Venus and women are from Mars (or something like that). Men think differently to us women. I heard a great example of this.

Boy and girl in a car and girl says

Didn't we have a great holiday and wasn't it romantic but I didn't feel like going back to work after did you?

Boy - Yeah it was great.

Girl - (thinking) He has gone very quiet maybe he hated our holiday really and doesn't know how to tell me.

Boy - (Thinking) Oh yes that was the date I took the car in to get it fixed. I couldn't believe how much they charged.

Girl - (thinking) I wonder if he is working up to tell me we are finished - I am getting worried now.

Boy - (thinking) Maybe it's time to think about changing it for a newer model, I fancy a sports car next time.

Girl - Thinking) Oh why is he so quiet, I know he doesn't love me really.

Girl says with tears in her eyes - I know you don't love me any more so just tell me and get it over with!

Boy says Huh?

This is not on you, please know that. It's the ugly disease we deal with. Most people don't understand because they don't walk in our shoes. Are you able to get any information on this & have him read about it? I'm here for you wishing you the best. Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!!!

ronnellstc profile image
ronnellstc in reply to

He himself suffers from bipolar and manic depression, as well as anxiety, so i know he understands it, and gets it but i still let it affect me and it ruins my day, i feel helpless.

in reply toronnellstc

You need to work on you. Try to find & focus on the positive things or places in life. Remember to breath slowly in through your nose then out through your mouth. You can do this. Fight the good fight, only one you...makes you special! Love, peace, joy, light & hugs!!!

ronnellstc profile image
ronnellstc in reply to

Thank you :)

in reply toronnellstc

My pleasure..I've got your back. Love, light, peace, joy & hugs!!!

AZ1970 profile image
AZ1970

Have you been listening in on my conversations? LOL. I do this ALL the time. It is a form of hyper vigilance and codependency. "I have to make sure you are ok, so I know I am safe. If you are not ok, I am not ok. If you are not ok, I must have done something wrong. I need constant reassurance." It goes on and on. I have started talking back to the thoughts. Out loud when I can. They are irrational, I know. But they feel so real.

ronnellstc profile image
ronnellstc in reply toAZ1970

I have never thought about talking out loud to my thoughts. I guess it would make sense to do so, realizing they are irrational and not founded in any truth.

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