Need to know how to help my husband

[beaster1222]

My husband has been having major signs of bipolar disorder. I can not get him to get help. I feel like I walk on eggshells because I never know what will put him back in a suicidal state. He almost committed suicide a few months ago. He did not attempt it but told me about taking his gun and sitting in the truck. The last couple of weeks have been fine but tonight we had a pretty big fight and of course it went to "I know I suck" and then he wouldn't talk to me anymore. I don't mean to sound cruel but I am so frustrated and get tired of hearing the pity party everytime he chooses to be hateful with me. Help.....

[Hidden]

Hi, he needs to be evaluated by a psychiatrist it maybe bipolar or something else. Then get on the correct medication. My husband has anger issues and he is now on an antidepressant as well as a small antipsychotic med.

[Missnoname]

My heart goes out to you, you are in quite a situation. I had a fiance that committed suicide, I'm not discounting his feelings. But please read up on gaslighting and other forms of psychological abuse and assess the situation. You need to care for yourself first and foremost, and you deserve a healthy, mutually respectful relationship. You can ask him to seek help but that is his choice, and you are not responsible for his feelings or for fixing him. Ultimately, at your best you can stand by his side and support the decisions he makes, but you have responsibilities to yourself and your own life, too.

[fauxartist]

how do you know he is bipolar....and has he been properly diagnosed by a professional. If he is suicidal....he needs immediate help. And your not the person to do that, for one thing....it's not a pity party....it's a disease...and it's not his or your fault. When someone who does not understand mental illness...such as depression, which is part of bi-polar....but also it's own entity.....they loose patients often because they don't know what to do, they get tired of guessing what to do, and can often make things worse because they are frustrated and the person having a crisis feels even worse. If you want to get your husband help....get him evaluated, diagnosed, and in treatment. And try to just not take his disease personally, this is not about you....it's out of his control....being angry helps no one....just get help.

[Hephzibah2014]

I would make sure you are in a safe situation first and foremost. Are there any friends or family members you would feel safe confiding in that could maybe come around more often and check in on him(maybe without him knowing that you said anything so he doesn't get too upset?)? Has this been going on for many years or just all of a sudden? Is there something that has happened recently in his life to make him feel this way? Its so difficult for anyone, but esp. men to admit that there is a problem. Then having them take meds if they need it might take a miracle. I found out recently that an uncle of mine was suicidal when my cousins were children. It was very difficult for them. She says she remembers them all sitting around in a circle and begging him not to kill himself. I guess he just felt a ton of pressure from his world to be ok and had a hard time getting help. He also left in the truck once with a gun. It was very hard on my aunt who felt like she had to deal with it herself. Do you have a counselor you can talk to about this so you can at least get some help and support for yourself? Theres so many actors, like Robin Williams, who have taken their lives and we all just can't help but think how much different things could've been if they had gotten help. There are several numbers he could call to talk privately with someone. 1-800-SUICIDE or 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)

For international contacts: suicidepreventionlifeline.o...

also, Focus on the Family can provide a free consultation over the phone if you're interested 1-855-771-HELP (4357).

I believe in miracles and I'll be praying for you and your husband <3

[Hidden]

Hi beaster1222, sorry you are dealing with this alone. I bet you are frightened for his well-being too. Unfortunately, I had a similar situation with a family member, and could not get a lot of support. In a lot of situations like this, the person suffering with the condition has to seek the professional help and support themselves. Which in a lot of instances they will not ... you are then left high and dry to deal with situation alone. It can be very frustrating. You mentioned he had tried to end his life two weeks ago. If I were in that difficult position, I would ring emergency and explain what is happening. He may then get referred quicker, to seeking the support he desperately needs and deserves. Keep in touch on how you doing. Look after yourself x

[Lain599]

Sounds like severe Depression...psychiatrist and therapist? I am not a doctor so blow this off it it does not fit.

I am Bipolar. I have PTSD and GAD, as well. I did commit/attempt suicide. I was told I would always be depressed.

Guess what? For me, it was my toxic family and husband! Until yesterday, when I saw my now former, abusive lawyer, I lost the horrible despair, feeling of low worth and depression.

Oh boy! They are back again with major anxiety due to the fear of the future upcoming. However, tomorrow is a new day!