New to the group

[EmilyH3287]

Hello, I have been dealing with anxiety and depression most of my life. Up until recently, I thought I had it managed. I was wrong. I began fearing leaving the house, almost like there was impending doom just on the other side of the door. I tried the old "fake it 'til you make it". That just made it worse. I went to the ER a few weeks back with horrible stomach pains and uncontrollable vomiting. They could not find any medical reason for the symptoms. A week ago, I became part of a group therapy pod. They encourage us to reach out for further support groups to try to help us each return to a functional lifestyle . Hopefully this helps.

[thatjuanguy]

I know how you feel. There have been times when its managed and times not so much and I’ve learned we can find things to help get through the day to day. Do you have anything like that?

[EmilyH3287 in reply to thatjuanguy]

I've noticed I have to do some sort of exercise everyday. That really helps. We've also cut all alcohol out and on a clean eating diet. So, far I'm getting better...I think. I also write down the bad thought on repeat then don't look at them again. It's like they stop when I write them down.

[thatjuanguy in reply to EmilyH3287]

What are your bad thoughts?

[EmilyH3287 in reply to thatjuanguy]

It's just a central idea of not being myself anymore and how I will never get back to being me. No one actually enjoys my company and it's be better if I was just gone. It just goes on and gets worse from there. What are your experiences?

[thatjuanguy in reply to EmilyH3287]

How are you not yourself and why can’t you get back? And I’m already enjoying your company. I have pretty bad social anxiety depression and abandonment issues since everyone just seems to leave at some point. It’s a life full of ups and downs but I try to keep pushing forward.

[EmilyH3287 in reply to thatjuanguy]

That's the part that sucks. I don't feel that way all the time. But when I do, I don't realize that they are completely irrational. They are just so overwhelming in the moment they seem true. Like I said earlier, exercise has been a huge help. I haven't been feeling lost in my thoughts lately. On a funny note, in my group sessions we talk about will power being finite and does occasionally run low, so we have to recharge it. I'm definitely feeling like I'm recharging lately. I have to head to a meeting but it has been great talking. Thank you for the warm welcome.

[thatjuanguy in reply to EmilyH3287]

We all need a recharge sometimes have a good meeting. Of course you’ve always got friends here

[Tired5339 in reply to thatjuanguy]

Isn’t hard to keep pushing forward especially when there’s so much hurt? I try to pray to God to help me get through these feelings of loneliness. I know he’s listening but sometimes I feel like the feeling of isolation is so overwhelming.

[Tired5339 in reply to EmilyH3287]

Hi Emily, I know how you feel. I feel the same way. I think it all started after I got married. I think I was a better person when I was single, and now, I just feel that I have to work really hard to gain affection from my family. I really don’t have any friends, and the ones that I do are special but if they knew who I really am, I don’t think they would enjoy my company either.

My husband is verbally abusive. He always talks to me in a condescending tone. Makes me feel worthless, useless, ugly, stupid. I’ve tried to leave him several times and keep coming back cause he always says he will change.

I know your pain. I have it too.

[thatjuanguy]

Exercise and writing are great ways I ride bike trails often it’s really relaxing and I’ve been working on writing a couple books it’s a really good place to let your thoughts and emotions flow. And as long as your trying your getting better.

[1OshunDreamer]

HI Emily. I know how you feel, I just joined today in hopes that I can get myself under control again. I was under control for about 2 years when my husband of 30 years decided to split. I started journaling and answering the questions in the Anxiety journal when I realized I'd had Anxiety all my life and many, many panic attacks over the years. I would get that sense of doom you mentioned. I've been in the ER with chest pains in the past. It's terrible to feel this come and go.

[Ravnfool]

I'm new too and suffer the doom panic attacks where I hyper ventilate. I'm starting to excrercise to see it that helps. Does cutting out alcohol and caffeine really help too ??!

[mjlitl13]

Welcome Emily!

I can relate. I too have suffered from anxiety and depression and, at times, I felt it was under control.. However, due to one annoying side effect, the from all the older antidepressants, I spoke with my Dr about it and we tried a few of the new ones, but each of them caused worse side effects like uncontrollable crying.

When I went back to my old medicine, my IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) acted up. My Gastroenterologist felt that it was due to anxiety and stress.

The result was 10 long months of dealing with almost daily bouts, keeping me in the house and eventually causing me to be afraid to leave.

Finally, my Psychiatrist put me on a fairly new mood stabilizer to add to my existing meds. It is called Abilify and it only took a few days on the lowest dose before my IBS stopped! Plus, I started to get my energy back and ventured out.

Now, I am only taking a slightly higher dose and my confidence is back, I have getting out more to do some FUN things along with the usual chores!

Emily, you have come to the right place and I am proud that you reached out for the help you need!

Keep us updated.

Hugs. MJ

[Beauty987]

I know how you feel. I have suffered with panic attacks, anxiety, PTSD, etc. Did something happen recently to put you into a panic mode. I have had panic attacks basically my whole life but didn't realize it until they started to interfere with my life. I started reading and doing a lot of research on anxiety and depression. I found out that they go together. When you have an episode of anxiety your system goes into overdrive. Then when the episode passes, your system dips, causing depression. For me the best thing has been trying to manage my anxiety so I don't experience the highs and lows. When I start to feel anxious, I stop and think about what I'm thinking that could be causing it. I also use essential oils for relaxation; exercise; drink plenty of water; avoid caffeine and processed foods; meditate of Bible verses; and read self help books. They have taught me how to recognize the symptoms early and also given me coping mechanisms and good habits that I can use to replace the bad ones.

These books are some of my favorites: Rethink How You Think by David Stoop; Change Your Brain - Change Your Life by Daniel Amen; There's a Lot More to Health Than Not Being Sick by Bruce Larson; and Adrenaline & Stress by Dr. Archibald Hart. The website unlearninganxiety.com was a big help also.