Feeling Trapped in my job

[Byelka]

I've been at the same job for a little over 7 years now. Lately my therapy sessions are consumed with my stress and worries about my job. I'm at the point where I really want out, but my experience doesn't translate well into other careers. I've gotten some training in other fields but once completing this training I don't think those careers will give me the ability to leave my current job completely. I would likely only be able to do them part time. This summer and fall is going to be especially stressful because we have one peer of mine leaving our office, and another will be on maternity leave, plus all the vacation time thrown in.

I'm a supervisor and always feel like everything falls on my shoulders, even though I'm not the department head. My department head is very hands off, and really isn't familiar with what's expected of the day to day for the rest of the staff. So if something is not being done right, or staff have questions, they come to me, even if I'm not their supervisor, our department head is. It's a lot of responsibility and I haven't received a cost of living raise once since I took this job.

I'm up most nights thinking about what I didn't get done that day, what I have to do the next day, what I don't have time to do. Then someone calls out the next day and I have to do the work of two people. I'm so physically and mentally exhausted when I leave for the day. I feel like my quality of work suffers, and I get frustrated when I see other staff not be as passionate about the work, which I am. I believe in the work I do which is probably the only reason I do it still. I just don't think I can keep doing this for long, but I don't know what else to do.

Any advice greatly appreciated.

[kaydeLOD]

one important thing my therapist told me once was, never think of tomorrow. I used to tell her I will go home and think about what I have to do tomorrow and the shit load of work I had for tomorrow. she looked at me in the eye and said " do you know for sure you will be here tomorrow?' I paused and I said no but I still worry , she said live your days as they go don't stress over tomorrow because tomorrow is unsure tomorrow might not be here and while you were worring about tomorrow you didn't get to enjoy today. hope everything goes well at work . (:

[hypercat54]

Hi one thing I can think of straight away is to refuse to do your Deputy's heads job! You are not getting paid for this - they are. They seem very good at delegating and you can bet they are not suffering the stress you are even though they are being paid more.

It might seem harsh but I think you need to refer your staff to the person who is being paid to do that job.

I know you said you believe in the work you are doing but cynical old me has been in a similar position to you and cared about my job too much and the work, and it got me very stressed because of it. I have learnt that employers these days don't understand loyalty or commitment so why not take a step back? It's not a case of working harder but smarter. x

[Rpan]

I get joggling many hats especially when it comes in to your lively hood. Maybe you can tame some of your own expectations. Often when I focus on my fellow staff members I lose focus on my tasks and expectations. As a supervisor that is a little different, I’m not a supervisor. Take the option of leaving the position off the table. It just complicates what you you need to do in the here and now. Maybe you can set a long term plan to transition into another role, or even a new job. That will require long term planning. If you chose to make those long term plans do it with a poison of power and not one of failure. You can conquer all of the stresses within your current job by setting up boundaries. I would start with a list of priorities and invite your administrator into this list. What you ultimately need to create something tangible that you can complete in your day, something that will make you feel accomplished at the end of your day so that when you leave your done for that day. This may require a very different way of doing things. Have a heart to heart with your administrator let that person help you with sorting out some of the organization that is required for you to feel empowered in your current role. Once you are able to find some resolution, than consider your long term plans. Those are my thoughts, I hope this is helpful. I’m a health care professional it’s very hard to prioritize things but I’m able to do it and feel accomplished so when I’m traveling home I decompress and am able to relax before the next day. It takes vigilance and many days I require others to hold up there end. I do that with clear communication and they know what I expect as I take the the time to teach and I ask many questions.