I'm Sierra I'm New....

I haven't learned anything about my anxiety accept that I stress over the little things. I would like some tips and tricks to helping my illness. I'm hoping to learn something to not only help me but help others with anxiety. I have had depression in the past and have recovered successfully the only thing I haven't mastered is my anxiety and I was hoping to find answers here. I hope I can learn some new things.

[Elaine1963]

Congrats on overcoming depression. I have anxiety and it sucks. I cope by sharing online with others and I just started therapy. I do not take any medications. I use herbal supplements and I redirect myself by keeping busy.

When I feel an attack coming I begin to take deep breaths. Move around or call a friend and chat with them.

That being my attacks happen while alone so until ready to start exposure therapy I am not alone.

Deep breaths

[Hidden in reply to Elaine1963]

Thank you so much for your information and kindness. I'm also not on medication I haven't been put on anything and I was hoping to find some natural things that could help anxiety.

[Mark-Harrison-Viera in reply to Hidden]

The one thing that helps me is that when I feel really anxious I plug in my ear buds and listen to my jams, or I talk to those closest to me, I feel that Anxiety can be hard when you deal with it by yourself, and when you friends and family who support you everything can get better.

[Hidden in reply to Mark-Harrison-Viera]

Thank you so much and your right. I love music.

[roseanxiety in reply to Elaine1963]

what supplements do you take? i take some too

[Hidden in reply to roseanxiety]

I take none at the moment I'm still new to my anxiety and I wish I could find natural supplements I could try out to see if it works for me.

[roseanxiety in reply to Hidden]

try taking magnesium citrate, and valerian root works well too. do some research though because supplements don't work the same for everyone! Also, chamomile tea is wonderful for calming down. You can also go to a supermarket or pharmacy and look in their supplements section, usually they have supplements that are for anxiety. I take these ones that say Anxiety Free on the bottle and they help.

[Hidden in reply to roseanxiety]

Thank you so much I will definitely look into it I needed the help!

[roseanxiety in reply to Hidden]

You're welcome, good luck!

[Elaine1963]

Adrenal Health, Zenmind and magnesium 200mg

[Hidden in reply to Elaine1963]

Thank you!

[SebastianMax]

Your mind is designed to help you survive, it does this by focusing on satisfying your needs(things that you require to survive). You have physical needs (like food, rest, going to the bathroom, etc.) and mental needs(being in control of your life, security, importance, etc.) Whenever you feel like you won't be able to satisfy your needs, you'll start generating energy+stress(you'll feel like you have a lot of energy and you'll feel bad when you have all this energy because your mind wants you to use it to satisfy your needs). Most people make the mistake of trying to relieve the stress that they're generating with temporary measures(like overeating/eating when they're not hungry/stressed, smoking, drinking alcohol, taking drugs, listening to music for hours, releasing stress through sex, doing exercise for many hours, etc.) but this won't work, cause you're still generating stress and you're just avoiding the real issue. Not only that, but your brain develops resistance to these temporary ways of relieving stress and you'll need more and more of that thing which you use to relieve stress(that's why people who eat to feel good feel like they need to eat MORE each time they're stressed. the same with people who take drugs and those who listen to music to feel good and all the others).

Every time that you experience a certain event, your mind will focus on that event, it will interpret that event and you will come to give this event a meaning(how this event will affect your life, how your personal needs will be affected by this event). Depending on the event, your body will generate an emotion(emotions act as a compass to guide your actions). Depending on the emotion that your body generates, you will act in a certain way to get a certain result.

This would be the process that takes place within you every time that you experience a certain event:

Event(focus) --> Interpretation(what is happening) --> Meaning(how will this event affect my life) --> Emotion --> Action --> Result

Every time that you interpret an event, make sure that you're using the right information to give the event a meaning. After you interpret an event and you give this event a meaning, this process will be skipped the next time that you experience the event(or a similar event). So, the next time that you experience the same event, this will happen:

Event --> Emotion --> Action --> Result(this way you'll be able to act much faster and you won't "waste" mental resources to process the information)

The thing is: you can't use your force of will to change your emotions or your actions, because these aren't the "cause", these are the "effect". Interpretation leads to meaning, meaning leads to emotion(to the things that you feel), emotions lead to certain actions and the actions that you take will determine your results.

Be aware that you will only interpret an event THE FIRST TIME THAT YOU EXPERIENCE THE EVENT, the next time your brain will skip the interpretation(because you need mental resources to process information and your brain likes to save these resources for when you might need them the most). That is why people don't know WHY they feel bad(they're skipping the meaning of the event) or feel like they can't change what they're feeling(they're skipping the interpretation of the event).

So, for you to change the process, you'll need to focus on the part of the process that is being skipped.

¿You want to change the emotion that you feel in certain situations? Change the meaning that you're giving to that event.

¿You want to change how you act in certain situations? Change the emotion that you generate when you experience that event(by working on the meaning)

*You can change the meaning of an event by working on the interpretation of the event.

IMPORTANT: your mind is trying to satisfy your needs. If you made a correct interpretation of the event, listen to your thoughts and how you're thinking this event could affect you and focus on satisfying your needs. If you were mistaken, reinterpret the event and give it a new meaning so that you generate a more "precise" emotion to generate new actions.

**

I'm feeling "this way".

Why am i feeling this way? What am i focusing on?

I'm focusing on "this thing"

How do i think this thing will affect my life?

I think this thing will affect my life "this way"

What makes me think that "this thing" will affect my life "this way"?

a)Mistake(incorrect interpretation)-->reinterpret and give a new meaning

b)Correct interpretation-->satisfy need

What do i want/need?

What do i need to do to get what i want/need?

Example:

I feel anxious when i'm about to meet new people.

-Why do i feel anxious when i'm about to meet new people? What am i focusing on?

I'm focusing on getting hurt by these people that are total strangers.

-What makes me think that these strangers will hurt me? What evidence do i have that strangers hurt others? Have i ever met a stranger that did not hurt me? What do i mean by "getting hurt"? What lead to them hurt me? Instead of getting hurt, what would i like? What would i need for that to happen?

I'm not 100% sure they will hurt me, but there's a chance that they might. By getting hurt i mean by getting taken advantage of, being used by others as i was used by other people in the past. I did meet people who were really nice to me, and they were total strangers. They were nice to me even tho they didn't knew me. Others hurt me because someone hurt them and they learned that from those people. I would like to find people who are kind-hearted, sweet, supportive, honest, loyal, inspiring people who help others and make the world a better place. I can't manage how others will act, but i can manage how i can react and i can increase the chances of finding the kind of people i'm looking for.

-What would i do if they try to hurt me? How would i "increase the chances of finding the kind of people i'm looking for"?

I would stand up for myself(by being assertive), give them a warning and get them out of my life if they persist with the bad intentions. I can modify my perception by increasing my awareness on the type of people i'm interacting with and being crystal clear on what type of people i'm really looking for. By defining and describing these people(their way of thinking, their way of feeling and their way of acting/treating others and themselves), repeating the patterns until it pierces into my subconscious, i can install an image of the kind of person i'm looking for into my subconscious mind and make my job a lot easier because i'll start generating an attraction towards these kind of people. Not all people are bad, there are all kinds of people out there, i just need to find the right ones. And i won't find out if they're the right ones or not if i don't interact with them. So the best thing would be to start approaching and finding out what kind of people they are. If they're not the kind of people i'm looking for, its ok, i just need to keep trying. But if the kind of people i'm looking for are mixed in between them like a salad, the only way to find out is by approaching.

-And now i start feeling more relaxed and i start looking forward to approaching people i don't know.

Remember:

*Its not the event itself that generates the emotion/feeling. Its YOUR PERCEPTION OF THE EVENT(how this event will affect your life/your needs) that generates the emotion/feeling.

*Managing how you interpret events in your life, the meanings that you give them, how you manage your emotions and your actions is a skill which will get better the more you do it.