Too much too fast!

[michael52]

Allot has happened to me since Nov 2017 : lost two jobs, my house of 25 years, had to move to a new state, moved away from my kids, gave up my dog, went through bankruptcy, started a new job I find I dislike, court battle with my ex again, my mom has Alzheimer’s and each day it’s a struggle. However, the fight is real and I love the outdoors and discovered fly fishing. I love to read too! So many changes in the last six months has been very hard. If you have experienced anything like this please post a reply...I’ve really no one who understands the emotions connected to such change.

[fauxartist]

yeah, I completely understand...I called it re-inventing myself due to unforeseeable circumstances...of course that is the 'Socially acceptable version of'....I saw it more of at the time a 'cluster f*ck'....it's endless what happened within a two yr. span of life for me. 'Diddo' on everything you said plus....2 deaths...1 suicide...menopause, lost my business, ...cluster migraines for the first time, and on and on. Friends you thought were friends drop off like flies in a bug zapper...and my family were no where to be found...of course I don't blame my sister though...

She had breast cancer during this two yr. period also, 11 surgery's, and was given 11 months to live, she had 4 small children then, a narc of a husband who complained about dinner not being on the table after she got back from chemo, said and I quote: 'Your not that sick yet do you think you could cook us a meal'.... and 'Do your medicines have to cost that much'...so I almost ripped his arm off to beat him to death with it, but for my sisters sake, I kept my cool.

She asked him after a brutal week of chemo and radiation therapy to take the kids for an extra weekend and the next day he filed for full custody of the kids, stating she was unable to take care of her children.....I could say more....but you get what I'm saying.

And the list goes on...only not only did I have to sell my house and everything, and move to another state, A year later, I had to do it again.

And the fact that you, like I did, found your way within the chaos to find a life again, you love fly fishing, reading, etc. shows how we can survive so much...and still find happiness.

[michael52 in reply to fauxartist]

How did you climb out of it? It seems to be a battle everyday I wake up to take a step each day to go to work, keep that normal face one that is expected. No one seems to really understand depression. Sometimes it’s one hour at a time...others not so bad just keep my thoughts distracted or keep myself busy. There is a real sense of being alone. I’m married and my wife is disabled but that feeling is difficult to describe to anyone. I find solace in hiking in the woods...keeps things in perspective since the corporate world today is so enslaving. Tell me how you got through or are getting through?

[gogogirl in reply to michael52]

Been through changes- sorry about what you've been through especially with what you have lost- your dog , your home, your jobs. Yet you are still here. Wow.

[fauxartist in reply to michael52]

You are a survivor for sure...but dealing with depression daily is a work out sometimes. I personally take medication, but it does not completely take away the emotional roller coaster, it just smooths out the ups and downs a bit. Not everyone wants to take meds. and have alternative methods....I personally have to take meds. And of course that was a trial and error method as well. But it's definitely better. No one knows what your going through really but you, so it can feel lonely sometimes, but your in a great place here with a lot of us who have gone through so much in life. Even though different, or similar, your still not alone with your stuff here.

[Hidden in reply to fauxartist]

Wow, and yet here you still stand. I applaud you! Just when I think my problem is a "problem" I always think of someone who has had it 10 times worse. I am so sorry about your sister for her to go through that and the audacity of that so called man. Just reading what he said & did had me infuriated. It disturbs me that yes there are indeed people like that. We definitely have the endurance & strength to keep going. We must.

[fauxartist in reply to Hidden]

the good news for her was that she divorced him....got full custody....the house...and is and has been in full remission from her cancer. Not to long into her chemo and radiation therapy....she lost all her hair, but was finally starting to feel a bit better, I stayed at the house a lot during this whole time to help with the kids. She said to me one day not to long before she filed: 'if I only have another year to live, it sure as hell won't be living with this arseh*le. I've had enough of him'.....yeah....karma

[Hidden in reply to fauxartist]

Yes that I do know about. So glad she did that, good for her. She deserves to whatever time she has left to enjoy the rest of it. Got rid of the a## and things got better. He was the cancer. So happy she had you!

[susieq572]

In 2008 I divorced my abusive husband, had a back injury and lost my job all in the same year. The next year I lost my house and all my belongings including 2 vehicles and ended up homeless. My mother would not even take me in. I went back to my ex husband but he is no longer abusive but is a heavy drinker. I am really miserable and probably should head back to therapy. My Zoloft does not seem to be working anymore and I can't sleep very well. I know how you feel having all those things all at once. I pray you can get better and I pray for myself too and all the people with this condition!!!

[Hidden in reply to susieq572]

Hugs to you!

[gilip in reply to susieq572]

Wow Susie that’s a huge amount to go through how did you get through??? I am stuck in deep depression and anxiety all my fault!! I had a breakdown in October lost my very stressful job which I loved and haven’t been able to work since I am 62 . Divorced my abusive husband 12 yrs ago also lost my home and though he promised to give me half his pension which I was entitled to now he has refused !!! So facing older age with nothing. When I think of my future I feel so very anxious. But so want to get better!! Please say a prayer for me too x x gilly

[Hidden in reply to gilip]

Praying for you!

[gilip]

Hi Michael wow is all I can say you have been through so much!! So hard to get back up!! I divorced 12 yrs ago and has been hard to get over. But fly fishing!! I love fishing but never tried fly fishing. Just wish I could find a new interest!!!

[Dubba61]

Hello Michael, yes, I've been through a similar set of horrible events. My ex n i lost our business, after struggling for a long time. He took to drink. My Dad died unexpectedly, then a divorce and all the legal stuff surrounding that. Somehow i found a way through. I do Tai-chi, listen to Mantras n self hypnosis. I always think Fly fishing looks so relaxed and of course being out in Nature helps. You will get through this time, as i did. Nothing lasts forever. Best regards. 😊🌻✌️

[michael52]

There is a saying...hope deferred makes the heart sick but when it is fulfilled it is a wellspring of life. I literally am disappointed when I wake up in the morning because the struggle is real all over again. I’m tired like so many here ...when hope is not seen on the horizon it makes the heart sick. However, I am choosing to believe that nothing is permanent and hope will one day shine her light on me. As a result I’m writing a book..I’m only a third of the way done, but it will be called “Broken but not beaten” and it will be a guide on how to turn Brokenness into beauty. It’s hard to write but is very cathartic when I am able to sit down and let the words flow like a river.

[Hidden]

In the future, are you expecting hardships? I fear that as well...hoping to never lose my home. Life is so unpredictable.