Anxiety and Depression Support

Hopeless

Hi, I haven’t posted in awhile. I’m trying to be strong but without the future I thought I had. I’m trying to meditate and be mindful but the only peace I seem to be able to have is when I’m sleeping. How do I move forward when my life has been committed to one person and now after 30 years he won’t even talk to me. I just get cruel text about selling our home and sending our belongings to auction. I’m visiting our son and I don’t when I can go home to try and settle things.. there’s no one for me at home..I truly need prayers, this grief feels like it’s killing me.

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This sounds like a huge change in your life and right now must be tearing you apart. My parents divorced a few years ago after 35 years and 4 children. I saw the effect it had on them both but particularly my mother. All I can say is that a few years on she has survived and even starting to feel happy again. I hope that you have someone to talk and give you a hug. Meantime I will pray for your peace of mind and relief from your pain.

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I’m so sorry to hear about your parents. You truly sound like you understand my despair 😩 Thank you for your kind words and prayers. I have 3 children, 2 daughter’s and a son who is his. They are supportive and loving..just far away. I’m extremely exhausted today..My son does hug me and does everything he can think of to brighten my days...I just can’t bare the heartache.

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I know and my heart breaks for you. All you can do is take it a little bit at a time and perhaps not think too far into th future. It's like grieving along with the hurt and fear of the future . You have shared a life with someone for a very long time and always be bound by your children. It's so hard but I hope you will have some good days among the bad. I'll be here to chat anytime you feel like it, my best wishes

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Thank you so very much..I’ve felt grief many times in my life..not quite like this😭I just don’t know how to “live” without my husband..I just feel so alone, scared and vulnerable without him...He clearly has changed and I must accept my part in that..He was always such a loving, caring husband..I’m just at a loss that he’s throwing us away. Thanks again hon, you really do seem to understand my excruciating pain💔

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Right now it won't feel like a 'life' at all, as you say your whole life has revolved around him and being a family. I hope for you that in time the strong woman that is deep inside us all will start to come forward to get you through. We will hold your hand all the way xx

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Hi, I know very well how you feel. You have a good support wtth your son. You have to step up and confront and start a new beginning.it may not seem that way now and you will go through rough times but the sun will shine again for you.my prayers are wilth you. Xoxo

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Thank you so much for your encouraging and kind words..xoxo

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The sooner you can arrange a separation and move into your own place and begin to find new activities and people, the better off you will be. Your husband does not sound like he is going to change. Putting things off in hopes that he will change is not helpful. This has all been a terrible shock for you and I feel very much for you.xx

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We have been separated temporarily since I’ve come to visit my son, at his request. My son’s. That all sounds well and good but moving into my own place is not feasible at this time. Whenever he lets me come back We have to somehow sell our home, get a divorce, go through piles of accumulated things after 30 years..The things you say make perfect sense..the problem is I’m living this nightmare.

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One thing you might think of doing is hiring a lawyer to start things moving. Your husband cannot keep you out of your house. I know that legally a spouse cannot be thrown out of the marital residence. I think a lawyer could help you get a handle on things and feel less powerless. A lawyer could also get the process going and take some of the burden off you. I do feel so badly for you and I do understand your pain, anxiety and fear. The only good thing about this horrible situation is that you have a son who obviously cares a great deal for you. xxxx

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Has this guy ever been tested for dementia? I read an article recently ( in AARP) about a women whose husband became callous and even gave away their hard earned money. Eventually this person ended up separating from him. He ended up being murdered by someone who took advantage of him. After the fact some type of brain testing was done, and it was found that he had a diagnosis of a very rare sort of dementia - his memory was fine- but his judgement and lack of empathy were the things that were effected. Isn't that odd? However, I really feel for you, and am sorry you are going through this. Thank goodness you have your son.

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