For the majority of my life I have had anxiety for many years I was able to co exist with my anxiety. I had a pretty good life in my safe bubble. I have had many changes in my life in the past 6 monthd that has triggered my anxiety and perfectionism to take up permanent residence with me. Aniety is completely out of control. I went to a psychitrist got diagnosed with general anxiety disorder with a side of ocd or what I call perfectionism ( most likely developed in childhood due to a tramatic events ( let's get this over with just rip the bandaid off this one.. mom walked out on me at age 4 went to live with dad who I rarely saw. Dad ran his house hold like a military/prison guard home he yelled a lot he instilled fear to control every aspect of my life never laid a hand on me i am not mad or even blame my parents i know they did the best they could with the limited patenting skills they had ) . No shock there typical psychology 101 stuff. I kept my family distant i moved 4 hours away and made a successful life . 20 years later im back to the city/town i purposfully left. Had to return due to dads health. The psychiatrist suggests I go to therapy and attend a support group. Therapy might eventually happen walking into a support group highly unlikely that will occur. am i really suppose to walk into a support group and relive all this ? I'm frstrated that I can't coexist t with my anxiety because it has taken over. Anxiety is rapidly destroying my marriage. I started taking buspar just over a month ago. my sec drive completely fanished. I wish my husband could be in my shoes for 4 hours so he could understand that it takes every oz of strengh to go to work and maintain. My anxiety is begining to lesson its been about a month of taking buspar. I have noticed that I'm more irritable and snappy. Sometimes I feel like I don't even know who I am anymore .. this just flat out sucks. I miss my safe bubble that allowed me to successully live with my anxiety . I am mad just mad that I have no control over this anymore.