I feel like I just be better off dead

[Lisa90]

I'm trying to find help took quizzes that say Bipolar and depression I have no insurance i don't know what to do I have 3 kids and I need help so I can be better for them

[monicrt80]

Hi Lisa90, I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now. I would like to ask you a few questions if you feel comfortable answering them. If not that's fine too, just trying to gauge where you're coming from and why or what leads you to believe the questionnaires are the correct diagnosis?

First are you in the U.S. or somewhere else? If you're in the U.S. you should apply for Medicaid asap. I just did this recently and thankfully was accepted/approved when though I was previously covered by my employer. I actually lost my job/was terminated in December, since I was in such a low depressed state I couldn't care for myself or even speak to anyone. So I let that slip away.

Second, are you employed? Even if you are you can/should still apply for Medicaid as I mentioned above.

Third, not sure where you're located or what state but there are several mental health clinics that are income based or free. I recommend googling NAMI, they can help & direct you to places available in your area.

Lastly, have you been treated for depression or bipolar disorder in the past? If so, I would start keeping track of any & all treatments, medication, counseling, etc so you have a bit of background information whenever you are able to see someone.

Let me know if you have any questions or if you need someone to talk to or listen. I've been there and know how hard it is to struggle, try to be there for our kids all while trying to keep my game face on so they also don't have to feel the way we do.

[Lisa90 in reply to monicrt80]

I'm in Augusta Ga I'm not working at the moment I have started help in the past but never follow thru cause things feel ok for a moment.

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

I can understand how difficult that must be for you. I’m not sure your location but there are many services in the US that help people. Monicrt80 has given you many of the suggestions I was going to give. Google is a good way to search for free to low cost mental healthcare in your area. I actually went inpatient in Virginia and it was based on my income so I only paid approximately $100.00 for2 weeks of full time care. I understand how that would be hard as a parent of 3. It was not like the stigma it comes across as. It was like a hotel. Very nice. The people were so amazing. We had nice fresh cooked food. I truly enjoyed my time there. I cried on the way from anxiety and fear but it ended up being one of the best things I’ve done. Then I cried the whole way home having to leave such a nice nurturing environment.

Think of one thing in your life that has been a blessing or happiness to you. A song your child sang, or an event. Then remind yourself that you will have many more of those moments in the future. Being a grandparent is awesome! All the love, snuggles, happiness etc without the daily stress. Your child’s marriage or graduation. So many beautiful memories waiting for you! Don’t miss them! Your children need you. Imperfect or not. Moms are not perfect. The love between you and your children is perfect. I’m glad you are here. We are a very nice group of people and you will find a lot of advise and encouragement here. If you need help finding care there are resources on the website here as well. One of us can also help you research if you need help. We would need your location which could be sent in private to someone. I truly hope you find the help you need.

[Lisa90 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Augusta, Ga 30904

[Windy101]

Look up the Crisis Line in your community and ask them about free help in your community. Most areas have mental health services with free or sliding scale services. There are also support groups that are often free for people with depression.

Sometimes we have periods when we feel better and then drop trying to seek help. I urge you to follow through no matter what, so you have the support you need and can start to move forward.

Best of luck to you! Glad that you're here. You've got a whole group of friends here who understand.

[kenster1]

hi I'm sure you are better off alive and not better off dead I'm sure your wonderful loving kids other family and friends would think the same.your doctor should be able to guide you to a service that doesn't cost you at all.we cant be left alone to suffer just because we cant afford to pay for help.dont give up keep on fighting for a better way of life.it will change it might just take some time.do you have a relative or a close friend to chat to.