What a life..

Everyone around me seems so settled, they have a purpose to get up in the morning, they have a partner, they have kids, a job, a home and I'm just idle..I won't have kids, no partner, I don't have a job, even if I do, so what, work home work home..Im alone, have no goals or plans, depressed..and time is just passing by..I've always felt ashamed and disgusted with myself...What a waste I am..seriously, what a waste..Im a mid aged male and have achieved nothing in life and can't see doing so..I don't know what it is..maybe my depression and anxiety?..I don't know , just have no motivation, no esteem, no confidence..nothing..Im over it..

[Ayinaj]

I feel the same i feel as i have no purpose here in life no one to motivate me

[purple361681]

its rough but u know everyone is fighting there own battles even people who have kids of a partner arent always happy.

[ComingUpRoses]

You just wrote my own feelings. I've always felt like something was wrong with me because I don't seem to have that same drive everyone else does. The drive to go to college, or just make something better of yourself. But the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. I have recently forced myself to get a job, and in many ways I feel even more miserable. I'm trying to set goals for myself, but everyday is still a horrible struggle with anxiety and depression. All I can really recommend is even though you have no desire to do so, try and make yourself get out there. I know it is horribly difficult. But it may help. I'm so sorry you feel this way, but I absolutely identify with it too.

[vanessi]

Hello, i am sorry you feel like that, i am still young but sometimes i would like to settle and have my partner and family. Sometimes i get jealous of people who have someone to share life and dreams. I feel like i have no future nor dreams.

I had a bf, we were gonna get married but he dumped me a month ago, he said it was cos the age difference. I am 23, he is 36, he has never been married nor kids. We were ok but after an argument everything was over. I am telling you this cos he told me he felt so negative about us and our future. I am mexican and he is irish, we planned i was gonna move there in Feb, but i think he might not be so sure about taking a risk with a young woman and he might be afraid i changed my mind and leave him (it never crossed my mind cos i love him) Anyway i have been thinking and there are many factors why he didn't want to continue.

I was living there for 3 months but we didn't even have a house, he lives with 2 other friends. One of them it is the owner, has gf, etc. He told me he felt uncomfortable cos we had to share a house and he wanted our own space. Apart from that he told me he wanted kids and i was not gonna want them cos i am so young. I told him we could wait for a couple of years, but let's be honest all that is a big commitment and i was sure i really wanted that commitment.

i have thought he feels like you. A 36 year old man with no kids, no house, no car, and with a 23-year-old mexican gf, who was gonna need to be through many immigration proceedings (so much responsability) etc. He said he loved me but he never deserved me, i deserve better and he feels he would be stopping me to live my life, that i can be succesful withoutt him. He said he is gonna stay alone but honestly who wants to stay alone all their life and don't have a partner and a reason to live every day?

I wish i could have him, i was so happy and i was gonna work hard to get our stuff, i never cared about money, appearance, or superficial things. I wanted to fight for him and i wanted him all my life. Life and love is about sacrifices too but he didn't want to continue this. He said it is nothing to do with what i just said but he has his male pride.

After telling you this, why you don't see a psychologist? Do you have friends, family, someone you can talk to? You are not a waste. Everybody has a purpose in life, the clue is to find why we are here and still breathing. I am so depressed too and i wake up every morning with lots of anxiety and hopeless, i feel i have lost my dreams and the love of my life but the only thing i can do is try to recover

i am here if you wanna talk, take care and try to cheer yourself up

[Hidden in reply to vanessi]

Thank you..I feel for you...I hope you have a fast recovery...Im here for you too

[Hidden]

I know that feeling too. I'm 32. At this point in my life I wish I was married and i had kids. I still live with my parents. I feel more alone than ever. I never had a boyfriend. I just feel that people can see what's wrong with me and i scare people away. I have low self esteem and I have gained at least 70 pounds in 5 years.

I do believe we all have a purpose in life. You are not a waste. Good things always comes we just have to be patient. If you need someone to talk to I'm here.

[Sarah_brarian in reply to Hidden]

There is nothing wrong with you. You are the most perfect you ever created.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you ..Its crap isn't it...I just can't find or see my purpose..I want to be productive..Its not working for me now..Im here too if you need me

[Sarah_brarian]

I know it's hard and I'm saying this to myself as well, don't compare yourself to anyone else. No one has been through what you have. No one has walked in your shoes. Don't think of your accomplishments in comparison with others, think of them on their own. For example, many of my coworkers are going back to school for their Masters. I only have a Bachelor's degree. Nope. Wrong approach. I am proud of myself that in the midst of unimaginable pain and anxiety, I was able to earn my degree. See? Give that a try. No accomplishment is too big or too small.

[Hidden in reply to Sarah_brarian]

Im sorta not comparing..Its just people are productive and I'm not...

[Sarah_brarian in reply to Hidden]

Noooo! Don't say that! You are productive. You are contributing to this forum. You are creating C02 which gives life to plants. You are energy powering this magnificent Universe! You are so much more than you give yourself credit for.

[Hidden in reply to Sarah_brarian]

Thank you..im trying to believe I am something...thank you

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

It gets greater later! Keep fighting!

[Hidden in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

What, this darkness?...Thanks Tinkerbell..its disabling in the meantime..

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to Hidden]

I know it’s hard. Just keep working on finding out what you want in your life. Not what others want. I do feel you can be more productive and happy if you make your own path. If that’s not what you want to do though then you need to find a way to be happy with your choices. Do not base the meaning of your life on what other people choose. I could tell you a billion things others have that would certainly not make me happy. You do you and do what brings you happiness and that’s all that matters! Once you come to terms with what you want out of life and start making small achievable goals towards getting there I feel you will find comfort in that. I’m miserable in my home. So I look at homes for rent imagining the pink couch I want (silly I know) and decorating and I find comfort in that. I just found out how to apply for section 8 housing. I also put a very tiny amount of money in a savings account to help secure my future. I am finding comfort in that. Obviously that is my situation and goals. Same principles apply. Set a goal and start taking small steps to make it happen. Whatever it may be. Then find comfort in a brighter future!

[Rena_81]

Sorry you feel this way,but let me tell you,you are cared for and about. I don't have alot of advice,I have felt similar and the only thing I felt to help me was good memories,looking frwrd to better days. I do have kids,a job and I an married but it's not all peachy I assure you. It's alot of tears,sleepless nights, worrying and alot of stress but it's worth it. You have to tell urself, I an worth it,I am worthy and then take things one day at a time. God bless you,keep your head up

[Hidden in reply to Rena_81]

Thanks Rena, I am doing just that now, trying to believe I am worth it..your right it may not be Peachy, but it's worth it..I agree, but I just don't have anything to be worth for and that's my point..God bless you and your family too..

[Rena_81 in reply to Hidden]

You are hurting I can tell,but never give up. Are there any groups you are in besides this one,?maybe a group for gamers,people who share common interests? It may be of some help to you. I have a life token bracelet I wear everyday,it says NEVER GIVE UP. I would like you to have it,if you were okay with sending me ur address,I will ship it out tmrw. You can keep your name off the address if u want,I think it may help you in some way.let me know. Sometimes little things can help to brighten ur spirit

[Hidden in reply to Rena_81]

That's so nice of you..yeah your right..Im hurting so much and im hurting others too..thank you for offering your bracelet..thank you..No need to send it , you keep it..I will keep those words in mind and I do..I will never give up!. Thanks Rena..wish you the best.

[Rena_81 in reply to Hidden]

I have worn it everyday,I want to just walk away from my job and my marriage at time but something keeps whispering to me never give up. I wanted you to have it,in the hopes of good karma and new joy to enter your life. Even when we hate what we see In the mirror,or hate how we feel inside,as long as we are a good person,do good in life,good will cone

[Rena_81 in reply to Rena_81]

Good will come to us! Bless you, hit the door running my friend,never look behind you!