I am pretty sad today, i am having lots of anxiety. I still miss my ex and i would like to have my old life when i was so happy
I haven't talked to him and i wonder if he thinks of me or something, even though i know everything is over. Having all that in my mind made me feel very anxious and i feel i am drowning inside. I am so depressed and i am still suffering.
I feel so guilty cos i think everything was my fault.
Please i need help
Paul Simon said it best
"losing a love is like having a window in your heart
You feel like you're blown apart
And everyone can feel the wind blow..."
It would be very unusual for you not to still be grieving about a relationship that has ended. Take your time and let yourself be sad. It's normal. Healing takes time. There is no medicine for a broken heart, but it does heal in time. It takes two people to make a relationship work, so please don't blame yourself. Be sad for awhile and begin to live your life without worrying if he thinks of you or not. You are important regardless of what is happening with him.
There is always someone here to listen, and many that have probably felt the why you feel now. But you're going to be ok.xxx
Thanks for replying, i don't wanna feel in that way but i can't help it, i miss him so much and i love him, i wish thing would be different, i look back at the past and i was so happy, i had everything a woman can ask for. He loved me so much, we were so happy. I could be myself when i was with him. Now it is just a distant memory that i don't wanna remember cos make me feel like right now.
I am having lots of anxiety and i feel really bad
Understand. Life is not always the way one wants it. But it does get better. It takes time for a heart to heal; in the meanwhile, your head can do some thinking about where and what you want to do in life.xx
Yes, i know life is not always in the way we want, i am so depressed thinking of what could be and now i lost everything. I am so hurt and broken and i don't know how to help myself.
The anxiety is killing me tonight and i don't know how to stop it
Hi Vanessi, I completely understand. I lost my ex due to a heroin overdose and think all the time of him and how I vmcould have done things differently. It's easy to remember the good times and erase the bad especially when you're alone. I believe God wants me to be where I am now and I'm closer than ever. He comforts me and I know my ex is where he is being taken care of - he just couldn't take care of himself so God is doing it for him. Not to say life for me doesn't suck sometimes! Talk to Him and he'll comfort you and you'll be guided on what to do next. Maybe you need to work on yourself as I do. I don't even want a relationship right now. I've never known who i am and what I want out of life so I'm taking a time-out right now to figure things out.
I feel your pain. I just recently had my ex that dropped me like a bad habit come over and wanted to know if I wanted to hangout again and be friends maybe more. I felt like I’ve been smacked in the face. I still have feelings for some stupid reason. But I refused and to her I thought I wasn’t good enough and she had her chance and blew it! It felt good at the time saying it. But my mind doesn’t play well with me. My emotions feel like a rollercoaster. I think I did the right thing. But if I do all this will happen again. I think anyways. I would’ve rather her just forget about me and move on. I found out she’s in and out of relationship with her ex before me. And he’s been running his mouth and I wanna shut his mouth soooo bad. I just need to stay away. He’s not worth jail time and neither is he. That’s what I keep telling myself. Sorry I’ve had a rough weekend and trying to keep it together. And I was finally thinking I’m over this mess and I bout fell back into it. Why can’t I get rid of these feelings for her when I know she doesn’t deserve them? I feel like I’m going crazy, or crazier. I know we are only human but dam! I feel for ya! I would try and send ya good happy vibes but I have none! Stay strong, stay positive, tell yourself you deserve better. Because you do!
I feel the same, my heart is so broken and i am so hurt, all these emotions are playing with my head tonigh, i miss him but we can't be together, also the memories affect me. I am having so much anxiety for this reason, i can't control it and i feel terrible. I know all this is cos him, he doesn't deserve it.
I am so mentally hurt and i get this anxiety thinking of him, feeling desperate, hopeless, thinking of what i wanted with him and he dumped me like trash, i feel like that
Nuckinfuts you did the right thing. She don't sound to good right now, with her ex and knocking on your door. You don't need that drama. Stir clear. The pain will subside with time.
Now, hold on a minute. We went from a broken heart that can heal to you saying you have lost everything and not knowing how to help yourself. Let your head control things for a while and remind your aching heart that tomorrow is another day. Don't let your heart take full control, just enough to start healing. Focus on something other than this man. Whether it is music or reading or starting a journal about how you feel. It's ok to be sad, but don't let your heart make you feel it's the end of the world because it's not.xxx
Hey.
Just wanted to put a different light on the situation. Whether you're breaking up or getting broken up with, leaving doesn't mean you don't care. We seem to be stuck in the mentality that "if he cared he would still be here" but that simply isn't true. People have their shit and sometimes things prevent us from being in relationships. I am in the process of breaking up with someone right now and as expected, they are really emotional. They have said that they don't think I care and that couldn't not be further from the truth. I still love them a lot and it's easier for me because I'm the one calling the shots, while they are on the other end feeling abandoned, rejected, and alone. Girl, you're strong, and you are more than your relationship. It's hard to feel rejected in this way but he might be hurting just as much. Just in different ways, ya know? He's loosing someone that he's close with too-- even though he was the one facilitating the break up
I understand your point and i think you might be right. The thing is i am very emotional and i became needy after coming back to Mexico. It was so painful knowing we were not gonna be together again. Last time he called me he said he missed me and stuff but he said he couldn't be with me, i just never understood why he couldn't. I don't know what is in his mind but he didn't want my help nor ppl's help.
He might be scared to take a risk with a 23 year old girl cos i am still young, but i always wanted what he wanted to. I wanted to settle down and have a life and family with him. Now all that hurts me so much.
I dream of him very often so in the morning or in the middle of the night wake up with lots of anxiety, feeling really desperate, worried, it is a bad feeling inside of me.
Well if you need someone to talk to:))
Don't think she caught your "hint". Maybe ask again. 
It sounds like you're very emotional, but a breakup shouldn't feel desperate and anxious. It also shouldn't leave you feeling bad about yourself. And why are you waking up in the night over something that already happened? It sounds serious. Maybe you have an anxiety disorder. From what I'm hearing, that's what it sounds like. Anxiety affects women starting in their late teens and twenties. It could be your anxiety is coming out more now that you've had a bad experience. Besides, it's not like you're a bad person- he was the one who broke up with you. You should see a good psychiatrist and they will tell you right away whether you have it or not and they have medicine that helps treat you so you feel better. A good psychiatrist will let you talk about your experiences and as well and that will help.
I had a very serious long term relationship years ago that ended when I moved due to a good job offer. We needed the money as he was returning to medical school. He could transfer schools. At the last minute he decided not to go with me.
Nine months later he called and asked if I "wanted to be married." I said no, because I was partially angry as I was starting to learn to live without him. And why didn't he actually "ask" me to marry him. As much as I loved him, I felt if he didn't have the courage to actually "ask" me to marry, that is the way our marriage would be like. Me always having to be the 'strong' one.
It hurt for so very long and that was normal. Although I met some very good people, took years for me to finally kick him out of my heart. I have a good husband in my life now. A good husband.
Darn if one day that man didn't come "knocking on my door" after 18 years, two divorces and 3 kids. Excuse me???? If it hadn't been by phone, there would have been a shoe print on his backside.
Sometimes we just have to hurt, really hurt, and there's nothing easy about it, and sometimes IT IS NORMAL TO HURT UNTIL IT DOESN'T HURT ANYMORE. xx
Thank you so much for your words, it hurts so much every day and i don't know what will happen in the future. Sometimes people say i am crazy, i shouldn't feel like that for a man but i can't help it, they have been on my shoes. It is a loss and i am hurting.
I really appreciate you told me your story
I don't know if all of us actually have had a love so deep, and maybe other people don't ever really feel that way....they love, but maybe not in the same way.
You're going to need to find ways to occupy yourself....Seriously, you need to do that....so that you can deal with this, even with the hurt, and stop talking to everyone about it......you can do that on this forum.
I remember how horrible I felt inside when I thought that man who was in my life for 5 years, who probably was THE love of my life, but I had to control who I told and how much. I had to work, take care of my apartment, and just find things to do. It's going to take time......and not all of your time.
There will another love when the time is right.xx
liquidglass,
You are balancing the emotional scale and thank you for writing.
Venessi, please read what liquidglass wrote...several times and maybe save it to read again when you are feeling badly. The reason I like to use the lyrics from that Paul Simon song, is that it seems to sum it all up when a relationship ends, regardless of who decided and takes the heat for it.
I'm sorry you're having a hard time. Just remember the good things about you. Don't bring yourself down with bad thoughts of fault about yourself. It's a bad place and you can get way way down to where you don't like yourself anymore. I've been there. Don't want you to go there.
Vanessa, what have you done for yourself today? It's hard, and you know that I KNOW what it's like, but tell me something you did today. It really is just one part of a day at a time. But do something that occupies you from thinking or feeling about him. OK? OK.x
ALRIGHT! Vanessa, best news I've heard in a long time. Any possibilities appear today?
not really, i was checking my email and i got messages from some schools in Ireland to study and work as i planned with my ex. All that affects me and makes me feel really sad. That is what i wanted and now everything is over
Venessa, remind yourself EVERYTHING is NOT over. HE is OVER, but HE is nowhere close to everything being over, He's just a big pain in your heart right now.
Why not still consider the study/work plan in Ireland. Know you're sad. But nothing is over until YOU say it's over. And you are nowhere near that.
So today was maybe not a good email day. But everything is not over. Just keep doing something for yourself. Every day.
You know we're here for you.x
thank you but going to Ireland would be go where he lives, and i would feel like i am chasing him. And also would make me feel so depressed being in the same country and without him.
I am saying all that is over cos they were our plans, we made them for our common happiness but i can't continue with them cos they affect me, too. I don't know if i put it clear why i said my old plans (which included him) are over.
I will have to make more plans in life just for myself
Yep, Ireland is probably out...afraid you might just run him over with an auto even though you're hurting. I told you what I did, so running him over could actually be a possibility. DO NOT want that to happen. (Well, maybe only in your mind) If you ever want to PM me to keep me on track, that's fine with me.
Bad day
Anxiety is bad today.
Grateful-Bad days do pass
Anxiety is driving me crazy
Anxiety is a lonely affliction
