I have general anxiety disorder, and I tend to over think everything, including my relationships. I would like some advice from others on how to handle the situation I am in. I know without a doubt that I am over thinking the situation, and everything is probably fine and I just need to stop being so anxious, but that is extremely difficult for me.
I broke up with my ex boyfriend 9 months ago. We dated for 14 months total. I left him because he was cruel, verbally and physically abusive, and just not a nice person. I am proud of myself for working up the courage to leave him, as in the past I have stayed in toxic relationships for far too long out of fear of being alone. This time I forced myself to do it, reminding myself that it’s better to be alone than in a relationship with someone who hurts you and makes you feel awful about yourself.
So two months ago I made a profile on Match.com, and reached out to a man whose profile caught my eye. After a week of exchanging phone calls and text messages on a daily basis, we made plans for our first date, which went great. We have now been going on dates and hanging out at his house for two months now, and it’s going great. I really like him, and I can tell he likes me. My only problem is, how long is too long to wait for someone to commit to you? I worry that he may be using me for sex, or sees me as a temporary companion. I don’t know for sure if he sees me as a potential girlfriend, and I am too afraid to ask. I don’t want him to see me as needy or clingy, or for him to feel pressured. I don’t want to rush things, but I also don’t want to be in this awkward “gray” stage where we are more than friends, but not a couple, forever. I think about it on the days when I don’t see him and it bothers me and stresses me out.
Any advice on what I should do? I’m so afraid to bring it up to him.