A month of misery

I am Holly. I'm normally a happy and hardworking person when I'm not over stressed. I've been suffering from moderate to severe anxiety, OCD, and depression off and on for years. However, after I graduated college recently, my mind went haywire. First I fell into severe depression and developed more intense social anxiety over time. Afterwards, I began having horrible OCD and feeling like I'm being strangled by cords or have a sense of drowning. I try to ignore it but it can overwhelm me. That increases my anxiety. My mood has been going up and down and for awhile I became angrier than usual. Last night I had another weird episode of extreme irrational anxiety and those uncomfortable OCD feelings. I felt terrified and couldn't sleep well. I had to take a little more medication. I was not quite myself. That happens off and on sometimes recently. But just a month ago I was happy and not struggling with this serious of issues. I believe that big life changes really upset my body and mind. Not having a schedule really messes me up too. I was the President of a club, did an internship at a High school, went to school almost full time, I often hung out with my friends and made new ones easily, etc. But having to leave everyone and find a new place in the world messed up my mind yet again. I need help but I want to just be ok. I know that's not how it works. I don't like talking about these meltdowns with people..but I believe if we find we aren't the only ones like this, we find peace and relief. Therefore, I'm being brave and joining this group.

2 Replies

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  • Welcome to the group Holly! For many years I suffered from the same issues you mentioned. Life changes would make my ocd worse. And ocd, anxiety, and depression go hand-in-hand. I don't know if you're seeing a psychiatrist, but I take fluvoxamine, lorazapem, and klomipramine. The last one rid me of my ocd. Also, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is REALLY important. If you can't see a psychologist, purchase "The OCD Workbook: Your Guide to Breaking Free from Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder" by Bruce M. Hyman, PH.D. and Cherry Pedrick, RN. It's cheaper than therapy and it works.

  • I'm really glad that you made a step in the right direction! I just joined this group too, having dealt with depression and anxiety all my life. Your story really hit me for a few different reasons and I'm glad you shared this here, thank you.

    I also hope that you find some kind of peace knowing that I relate to your story.

    I recently went from having no friends to 2 friends... who are also depressed and have anxiety problems and we share our experiences with each other. It really helps to know you're not alone, even if you are in the literal sense.

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