Anxiety for me, OCD and Anxiety for my child who's 11

[shine39]

Hi I'm new on here and I'm currently dealing with my own crippling anxiety disorder as well as my child who has been recently diagnosed with OCD AND Anxiety, it's been really difficult the past few months watching my child change in front of my eyes. A scary situation triggered this at the end of the summer my child who has severe food allergy to peanuts was in contact with the allergen at the park without me and had a severe panic attack the first one ever.. then it led to nights of waking up at night scared and then the odd behavior started to show up until it was almost taking over his life completely. He has gone to therapy and started medication and the OCD is pretty much not noticeable to an outside person even myself.. his anxiety is another issue we cannot seem to get under control. It's mostly about school and separating from me. It's heart breaking and extremely hard for me as well I have anxiety and I sometimes well most of the time I can't get past my own anxiety and I'll let him stay home when I shouldn't. I've thought of homeschooling but I'm afraid I'd make him worse. It's just so much anxiety from us both it's hard to handle

[DragonTears]

Hi Shine 39,

I am so sorry that you and your son have to deal with these things. It must feel absolutely soul-crushing to see your baby struggle with something you know first hand is hard. I am so glad to hear you got him help and that things seem under control now. I find it remarkably strong of you to get organised about that, realising there is a real issue, what it is, how to get help, making the phone calls, going to the doctors, going to the sessions and supporting your son through this. You say you are overwhelmed and find it extremely hard, which I don't doubt for a second, but yet you have had the strength to step up and push through for your baby, now THAT is being strong! I think he is very lucky to have a mum who actually understands what he is going through. You'll read so many posts on this forum about people being heartbroken over the fact that their families simply do not understand their pain, but you do! I can imagine that you can talk to him in a different way, you have an understanding and can have a conversation that is a lot more open and honest, than probably most parents. I hope you continue to get support from the school, especially as there seems to be a separation issue happening. If he had someone to "catch" him on the school side when he arrives and goes about his day, not feeling the distance between you, perhaps that might help. To have someone he can talk to at school, so that you are not his only point of refuge. Whatever you decide to do, it has to be right for the two of you and you have to do it your way. You know your son best and will feel in your gut if things are right or wrong. Stay strong, get yourself some of that therapy time too, as you have to deal with your issues too, for your son. I think together you can tap into that love and shared pain to come out on the other side, stronger and more close than ever! I wish you two all the happiness and warm snuggles in the world!

[shine39 in reply to DragonTears]

Thank you so much !! Your response made my morning! I don't feel strong most days but I'm pushing through even on his good days which we are having many more lately but I'm so worried to get to happy or comfortable I'm afraid it won't last. I'm actually going to my first psychiatrist appointment today for myself to try to get a grip on my anxiety I have avoided this for years being treated by my primary doctor for anxiety.. but for my son I have to go and treat my anxiety. I have a huge problem with making appointments and just wanting to cancel them and I do that for myself often .. but for him I don't we have done doctors psychologists psychiatrists and he has a team at school I got him on a 504 plan which tends to his needs for his anxiety and OCD .. but thank you again for your comment it made my morning a little brighter while I try and see how school drop off goes today.

[hypercat54 in reply to shine39]

Hi I think any help you can get with your own anxiety will directly help your son to deal with his. It's not your fault but obviously an anxious mother must be making it worse for your son.

I think you have to make some firm rules about schooling etc. and stick to them. Children need to have boundaries and know where they stand as it gives them a sense of security.

Good luck. x

[shine39 in reply to hypercat54]

I agree !! I don't usually let my anxiety out near him or show it I hold it all inside and it's painful. I have cried with him at times when his anxiety got the best of him and me.. I have to get tougher I know it will benefit him that's why I'm going today to try to get myself stronger to handle it

[Starrlight]

My heart goes out to you two. I suffer from anxiety and have a 10 and 5 year old. My 5 year old's teacher tells me he is anxious in class.

All we can do is our best to help them and ourselves but i know it can be an overwhelming task.

My 5 year old once came to me saying he was upset in class and used the deep breathing which helped him. I was proud of him. So any little thing we can try to teach try to lessen the pain.

<3 best to you

[Starrlight in reply to Starrlight]

P.s. you are doing great!

[Starrlight in reply to Starrlight]

And best to you at your appointment.

[Morgysmum in reply to Starrlight]

try giving your son, something to use as a stress ball, then when they get worried they can give it a squash. it worked for my son.

[shine39]

Thank you

[shine39]

Aww I'm glad your little one uses the techniques to help❤️

[Want2BHappy3]

Sorry to hear that your child is suffering also, did you know that children can pick up anxiety from YOU? My adult daughter has anxiety, she said because of me. Seeing me like that scared her, that she began getting anxiety because if mom is scared than it must be BAD. doctors have also said the same...get her help NOW Its hard I know hiding this from our kids because it cripples you. wish you and your family the best

[Jas_singh]

I myself have been suffering from OCD for the past many years. But now I have found a way

to control it. It is working better in my case. Please watch this video to know about this meditative technique.

youtu.be/a5Q1LZPRFUo(Not working as expected?)

[Starrlight]

Just came back to wish you well and hope things are getting easier for you and your son 💕