New to the group.............

[n1cole]

I suffer from severe anxiety and moderate depression. I've been on Zoloft and it hasn't helped and honestly I'm bad at taking pills and stopped. Yes, I've gone back to the doctor and she's suggested talk therapy but with a 1 year old son and working full time... its hard to cut out 3 hours a week to go talk to someone so i thought this would be my next best approach. I've been in some terrible relationships in the past that have damaged my self esteem. I am constantly apologizing for EVERYTHING.... to the point I annoy myself about it. I always feel like I am in the way and/or I'm doing something wrong. I am in a great relationship with an awesome guy who supports me and loves me but for some reason i have a hard time talking to him and opening up. I just have this constant sense of worry that if i really tell him how i'm feeling that he will think i am crazy and leave me. It's this terrible cycle and I can't get out of it. As I said above, I have a 1 year old and I also fear I am a horrible mother. I always compare myself to other moms and wonder why i don't have my shit together like they do. I also have a terrible fear of my son dying. I dream about it and have nightmares often. After writing all of this down my issues don't sound that bad. I know people have it worse than me which is why I don't talk about it to anyone but it really does affect my quality of life. Thanks for reading.

[Ddorne]

N1cole, if you have severe anxiety you should find a therapist. I couldn't do without it. It would help your self esteem issues. Was the Zoloft bothering you? It takes a long time to work.

LD

[n1cole in reply to Ddorne]

I was on the Zoloft for 6 months. In that time they did up it after my first 90 days. It didn't bother me. I just felt it didn't do anything. I guess I should go back and try something else. That's laziness on my end. And you are right I do need to get into therapy. I just need to make the time.

[Hidden]

Hi Amitipytline calmed me down BUT it needs to be taken around 6 pm.

You sound like you have PND cos you have a 1 year old-can you not cut your hours in half !?

You are clearly doing TOO much AND your partner WILL support you - its not good to keep secrets from your loved one

Dont compare yourself to othere we are all different !

All The Best xxx

[anonymous07]

Try excercise, journaling, meditation, therapy and a healthy diet (not all at once so you're not overwhelmed), but try finding something that may help it over time. I once had really bad anxiety and went on a run and it went away. Not everything works for all, so you have to see what works best for you. Therapy may be the best to start first.

Hang in there.

[n1cole in reply to anonymous07]

The thought of talking to a therapist makes my anxiety worse haha. Which is just something I need to get over.

[menagerie11]

Hi n1cole. You might find some help through on-line self-help (anxietybc.com) is good. It sounds like you would really benefit from help with your anxiety and I would highly recommend a peer support group or a therapist.