When my sister opened up to me and we were discussing our depression symptoms, I noticed tons of similarities but an interesting difference. I wanted to pick anyone's brain about this. When we get extreme anxiety it is usually around people. She had a bad experience at work, where her manager was very unprofessional and was being rude to her and talking about her behind her back. She already struggles with self esteem, depression, has anger issues, and anxiety so when she heard this, she immediately broke down. Rather than most people, instead of having a breakdown and crying in the bathroom, she gets very angry. She says mean things and wants to hurt them. She never does hurt anyone but when she is venting she tells me she wants to just cut their throat or punch them in the face and then she has another breakdown and cries. Knowing my sister, I am very surprised she even handled herself professionally when inside I know she was thinking about hurting him. Luckily, I was there when this happened and she called me first so I walked down to her job in order to protect her and the man. This is when I discovered she may have MDD and talked her into going to therapy. What is interesting to me however, is her anger. When she has an anxiety attack or a breakdown, she gets angry and wants to hurt people. When I have anxiety attacks or am dealing with people and can't handle it, I want to hurt myself. I told her it's like immediately I want to pick up a shard of glass and shove it into my artery when I get those, and for her, she wants to pick it up and shove it into someone else. Is this normal depressive behavior or is this something else?
My sisters anxiety vs. My anxiety - Anxiety and Depre...
My sisters anxiety vs. My anxiety
My sister does the same thing. She lashes out in anger and I also think it is depression. When I am depressed I just feel like I am in another world or complete sadness and emptiness and desperately want to get out but can't. My sister just yells, screams and can become violent. She has finally agreed to see a therapist so they can help her with this. I do think some people react in anger when they are depressed. Not sure if this was helpful. Again, sending (((Hugs)))
I can relate to both. I have both feelings but I don't take them to the extreme endings. I want to hurt someone but not really...I want a safe place to take a big bat and bash against walls and break things and imagine I see faces and people but not anyone in particular because I don't hate anyone that badly...I also can vaguely imagine...no, no I can't, I can't imagine hurting myself. Why would I do that? I've only entertained suicide when the pain and anxiety has been so continuous and so unrelenting and there's been no hope for so very long that I couldn't keep going. The only relief from the anxiety would be to end my life when really all I wanted was a break. Even a little rest from the constant panic attack that never ends. When weeks turn into months...and no break happens, how long can 1 attack last?? But to hurt myself knowingly? No, not ever. That makes no sense to me.