I've become REALLY frustrated with myself. I KNOW what I need to be doing but I have this overarching "Fu#$ it" attitude. Not the belligerent form but the "Oh why bother" kind. I had an epiphany this evening: I'm faking living just enough so that no-one realizes I've given up. I've checked out.
I'm barely taking care of myself or my family and home. This seems more than just depression.
I have no clue what to do to "check back in." I'm taking my meds, I have a med review appt scheduled in May (first available.) I see a psychologist on a regular schedule. Exercise and getting outside are some of the things that prompt the "F it" response.