Needed to Talk

I tend to be a very open person with my mental illness because I feel it is important for people to know so that they can take the appropriate measures if something goes wrong. However I have several friends and family members who don't believe me. They constantly tell me that my anxiety is just stress from school and that depression isn't real and I shouldn't be/ have no reason to be sad all the time. I've tried to explain to them but my family members who think this way have just decided I'm too dramatic and don't talk to me anymore. They keep spreading rumors through my family that aren't true. The problem is sometimes I believe them. I think I'm being over dramatic and that just makes me worse. It makes me frustrated and sad and confused. It makes me want to keep to myself, and lately I have been. I stay in my room and just lay in bed. I only get up when my hunger becomes painful. I think my depression is getting worse but I'm afraid to say something. I was only diagnosed with depression about 5 months ago and it's very new to me. I'm not sure how to articulate my feelings because I just get brushed off. It's even hard to tell my doctor. I just really needed to get it out.

14 Replies

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  • I'm so sorry to read that you are having such a bad time at the moment. Depression is difficult in itself without having the added stress of your family not believing you. If someone has never suffered with depression then they will have a hard time trying to understand because they just don't get it. Please don't shut yourself off from your family and sit in your room alone. It's important that you stay social and not isolate yourself. There are so many people who feel the same way as you, so you are not alone. Please speak to your doctor openly and honestly and don't shy away from any help you can get. I hope that you get better very soon. X

  • Hi I agree it's a good think to be open and honest with others about mental health but the other side of the coin is others who don't understand, refuse to understand, and won't admit it exists. Be open and honest only to those who do and ignore those who don't. In other words be more choosy whom you speak to.

    Sometimes those who don't believe it have mental health problems themselves but are in denial about it. It is not logical but I have often found it to be true. You know how you feel and never let anyone deny your feelings. This is true of everyone in every situation in life. Your feelings are real even if others deny them. They are the ones with problems not you.

  • I try to be honest with my family and friends about my depression, some understand and some don't believe me either. I am going through a terrible episode right now and don't want to even talk on the phone to anyone and I know this is not good. I totally feel by shutting my self off, people are going to give up on me but can't deal with things when I am in this situation. I think back and I realize my momma was the same way and had the same problems, bless her heart.

    I was wondering if anyone has this problem that I have? I have a good day and be with people and visit and have a good time and then this is seems as if I am not suppose to enjoy myself and depression hits.

  • Hi, please seek some help for your depression, it's not good that you are feeling so low right now. Depression is a horrible thing to have to suffer from especially alone. There is help there for you, and you will feel better again and enjoy life without feeling down. Best wishes. X

  • Thank you Jan. Loosing my husband and my only sister in 2010 has taken it toll on me as they understood what I deal with. I am not giving up just waiting to snap out of low time. We are stronger than we think and never give up the fight!

  • I'm so sorry to hear of your losses. Please accept my condolences. It must be hard that you not only lost the people you love but also the people who supported you most. You sound very positive in not wanting to give up the fight and I'm very glad to hear of it. You have every right to feel low at times after what you have been through. I hope that you start to feel better real soon. X

  • I'm sorry you're going through that with your family and friends. People who haven't experienced depression don't understand what it feels like. They think it's something we can snap out of, but it's not. For the most part, I tend to be a private person. Only the people I'm closest to know about my depression. If someone asks me if anything is wrong, I just say I'm tired. We're very fortunate to have found this group. I'm new here. I just joined yesterday.

  • Cathy that is what I always tell people I am just tired and that is not a lie because depression does wear you out. Thank you for caring because is great to have each other to vent to at times.

  • I am so inspired by what I see in these posts. Wish we were closer and could all make a big circle around each other. Picture that being the case.

  • People who have never had depression can't possibly understand it. You can't just snap out of it. Who actually enjoys feeling under a dark cloud and anxious almost all the time? Sure, there are steps you can try to take to help yourself feel better as in baby steps to begin with but I completely understand what you mean when other people just don't understand it because they can't possibly. A lot of my family too are old school- you know back in those days no one recognized depression, talked about it or went to or believed in counseling. I've found putting yourself around other supportive people is a good first step. Even you don't have the family support, online communities like this one or even looking into a therapist could be a good start.

    We are all here to talk and support each other.

  • So sorry you are feeling this way, I too have had to deal with people not believing in me! I always get the your better than this just stop bieng depressed and get up and keep going. Or I get the your just sad today. I hate it, go talk to someone, find a free group there are many out there it will help.

  • Start with your PCP and tell him/her about your issues. You will feel much better once you do. Then you can put together an action plan which may include seeing a mental health professional, counseling, medication, etc.

  • Hi! What you just wrote sounds a lot like what I have gone through in my life too. Sometimes people get tired of hearing about it over and over. They often think of ways to get around this such as a person is being to dramatic. For some odd reason it helps them to think that way. That is far from the truth though.

    You need to be very careful about staying in bed for a long time. From my experience it can only get worst. You NEED to make yourself get up and do something. Even if it is something small and short lived. Perhaps something for five minutes and then the next time ten minutes.

    The other thing is to be careful about the negatives that you hear. That can end up being a think goo and take over us too. If you have some people who support you then listen to them and limit your contact with the negative Nellie's.

    You are very new to the world of depression it sounds like. Reaching out on here is a good start, I think. Many of us have been through many ups and downs.

    I hope that this has helped a little to you. If you need to talk please let me know. Sped Teacher P.S. Can I ask how old you are?

  • Thank you so much for the advice. It really helps to talk to people who experience what I do. It almost helps to validate what I feel. I am 16, turning 17 in May.

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