New here-need advice on want to overcome worries over loss of SSI and going to work ASAP

[Ladydrez]

I suffer depression & anxiety with what I think is fibromyalgia. My doc put me onadvice for anxiety on my lowest dose 7.5 mg twice a day & elavil 25 mg only at bedtime. I was off all meds 2 yrs & got better then when my ssi review was coming early April ,I started searching & apply for jobs but was not successful.The bad news came with lots of anxiety, pain flare-ups with fibromyalgia and light depression. I got my news I am no longer considered disabled though I have developed leg weakness while standing one place & shaking legs. My doc has said I need nerve tests but I have anxiety about going out anywhere out of my home alone . So not really part of any community activities or church or any friends or family to help me . I don't drive but walk or take Cota bus . since I am not expecting any income coming ,I am so afraid I will not get work before all my funds run out & need to know of any Columbus Ohio program that be free or very low cost medical insurance, care,prescriptions & offer ride help. I can't get help by boyfriend because he works too much & can only see him 1 day a week in evening.since this is in my community I appreciate any advicer

[BonnieSue]

You sound like you need to be on disability because your anxiety doesn't allow you to leave home (agoraphobia). Is this right? How did you do a job search if you can't leave home? I'm a little confused about those statements you made.

If you truly belong on disability, get a lawyer who specializes in this. I had to do this one time only and it cost me about $125.00. The SSI dept. reversed their denial decision upon getting a notice from my lawyer. It was well worth it.

You also sound like you need treatment for your anxiety and phobias. Someone appears to be treating you now, but your anxiety isn't covered very well. That needs to be under control so you can function. I don't know what drug you are taking for anxiety that you call "advice" at 7.5 mg 2 x day but it isn't enough and your Dr. needs to know this. In addition you're on a very low dose of elavil and that can be increased as needed. I wish I could help you with info on local resources, but I can't. I wish you the best and will add you to my prayers.

[Ladydrez in reply to BonnieSue]

Do leave my home some days ,it was in warmer weather but I made ways to fill out applications at places hiring nearby. When I get too anxious to go out ,I apply online for jobs . sorry I must've mistyped I meant to put buspar a low dose 7.5 mg 2 x day til Monday nite will increase to 15 mg 2x day but I worry about how I be able pay for it ,so I think be on low dose til know can find way to pay for it or keep getting free, is best. My doc is aware of my situation & is all for me working but not try be on ssi anymore cuz it will make me lose strength in my legs by not moving around enough & part of being scared of public is lack of going out much

[BonnieSue in reply to Ladydrez]

I'm glad you are able to leave home on some days and it sounds like you're under a doctor's care and still working on getting your meds to the right dose for you. So you really don't know how functional you'll be and whether you can hold a job until you're at a steady, stable place in your treatment. How can you hold a job when you can't always leave the house? And how else does your anxiety affect your ability to carry out the tasks that a job will demand? These are important questions that need answers.

If you're on SSI, you don't have to lose strength in your legs because you can exercise, even in your own home, to keep that needed strength. What exercise does a job hold that you can't do if you're on SSI? This isn't making any sense to me. And you can always make yourself leave home regularly with or without a job. That's under your control. I have to go places and be out of the home multiple times a day for most days. You have to take baby steps and train yourself to go out a little at a time.

If you are talking about working from home, that's different. You're applying online when you can't leave home, but are all of these applications for working at home? It sounds counter productive to be applying from home for a job that requires you to leave home daily but you can't leave home even to apply for the job. How will you leave home when your job demands it but you can't get yourself out the door?

I'm not trying to be critical here or shoot down your ambition to work vs. SSI, but the facts aren't adding up. Sure, your Dr. and you would ideally like you to be able to work, but are you really able? Or are you counting on your agoraphobia to be gone when you get your meds to a higher dose? Chances are it won't be gone and you'll need help getting rid of your fears.

You need counseling regarding all of these issues because it will help you get rid of your phobias and deal with your situation. Many counselors work under the umbrella of a church and they use a sliding scale to charge you. You don't have to belong to the church and they don't push religion on you. This is something you need very much so please consider it as soon as possible. A good counselor will help you desensitize your fear of leaving home and help you to be free of that and other problems you have. It will give you someone who's in your corner, supporting you.

I'm all for you working as long as you really can. I hope you do well as you increase your medicines.

[Dogs123]

I have avoided doing really good things and activities because of the depression. It can be overwhelming. More people suffer in silence, which is so sad. Hang in there. People care.

[Ddorne]

Yes you need to get in touch with a local community group. You can find someone to accompany you to your appointments,etc. Do you think you are disabled? I am thinking of applying for OCD and depression. But it must be hard to get. You seem like you need it. Get to all your Dr. Appointments, they are important. Write back often.