Generation Gaps

[CerealAllDay]

I had a busy Saturday. Spent all day with people, being social, out in the community. Come Sunday, I spent my day alone under a blanket on my couch. I did nothing but what I wanted to do for myself. I gave myself permission to empty the garbage and dishwasher on Monday.

But then my father comes in, in the afternoon, and lectures me that I've been on the couch all day. I have things to do. I should be up and moving, and he lists all the things he accomplished that day.

My father is an older European immigrant. Zero understanding of neurodivergence or mental health.

I'm at a loss on how to show him or explain to him how I function. To him it's laziness. And I'm not certain he wouldn't just be in the camp of "just do the thing", even if I did.

Anyone relate to this generation issue?

[Mamamichl]

I get differences within generations too. Look through articles with additude magazine or here with Chadd. You can also go through you tube channels ADHD_love, the holderness family or how to ADHD. You could find one that talks about social burnout.

My stepkid is trans. My daughter’s friend is too. When I explained that to my dad, he kept misgendering the friend, which is quite disrespectful. He never even met the kid and he pushed gender on them. He also says “I have pstd too” (yes, in that order, it he never respected us or stopped verbally assaulting us. I have gone no contact other than medical question emails for a year now. My mother (parents divorced), even went to the extreme by saying “i don’t give a f*** about your abc disorders”. She has officially given my daughter ptsd and I am totally no contact with her because me and my daughters mental health comes first.

Yes, these are extreme, but not all from the same generation are like our parents. Do what you need to for your mental health. If you have a counselor, do for articles too.

[CerealAllDay in reply to Mamamichl]

Thank you. I agree sometimes we need to cut the toxic out no matter the relation, but in this case, we live together with no option to change our arrangment.

I appreciate the support.

[Mamamichl in reply to CerealAllDay]

I’ve been there too.its almost like you’re being seen under a microscope… maybe start with the adhd_love group then.if you find a video that explains it, show it to him. They have a book called dirty laundry and the Chadd articles are good too, if he prefers written information.

[LisethHIS]

Hi CerealAllDay,

Thank you for contacting CHADD National Resource Center on ADHD. I understand that differences in generations can sometimes lead to misunderstandings about ADHD and its effects on individuals. I recommend sitting down with him and asking him to listen with an open mind while you explain how ADHD impacts you personally. At CHADD, we have information that might be helpful, and he could also listen to a podcast for more insights.

Here's a webinar that can help- chadd.org/webinars/do-i-hav... and an article- chadd.org/adhd-news/adhd-ne... chadd.org/wp-content/upload...

if there is anything else you need, please let me know.

Best,

Liseth

Health Information Specialist

CHADD’s National Resource Center on ADHD

chadd.org

[CerealAllDay in reply to LisethHIS]

Thank you. I'll look through this and see if any of this may help.

Unfortunately he is the type of man who is the expert of all and doesn't listen to anyone else even with credentials if it contradicts his opinion. He knows best. 😒