Fired from last two Jobs, hesitating to accept new one

[underwaterrocketship]

Hi everyone. I'm really new to my diagnosis, 25 and just realized I've been living with ADHD thanks to watching Allison Janey on 'Mom'. Anyway, I was fired from my last two jobs, and I'm so blessed that after months of applying that I've been offered another full time gig. But, I'm really really struggling with whatever you call "imposter syndrome" when it's based in ADHD feelings of inadequacy. "Why take any job if I'm going to get fired again?"

I haven't been able to get access to medication yet (doctor office issues), but I'm hoping to get connected to first person accounts of "bouncing back" or "success stories" about learning to manage your new diagnosis. I'm also really interested in hearing about how to "listen" to your own brain to understand what you can handle. I'm also interested in hearing about managing accountability. As a human, I want to learn and grow from my mistakes, and I don't want to blame my shortcomings on my diagnosis, but I'm having trouble distinguishing the two. Any further reading suggestions would be appreciated.

Thanks, peace and blessings.

[Hidden]

I have never had a job yet, but for me, learning what my brain can handle has been trial and error. My mind wanders all over the place and it’s been hard for me to make decisions at times. Usually I just give myself a bit of time to hem and haw and then I make a decision. But what helped me do this was realizing that there’s no perfect decision. That was hard for my perfectionist ADHD brain to accept. Also, if my hands start shaking or I blurt out my feelings or my eyes fill with tears, I know I’m getting to that breaking point. I’ve still got learning to do on ADHD but I’m learning. I wish you luck on making your decision. 🙂

[underwaterrocketship in reply to Hidden]

It's helpful to hear the correlation to perfectionism. Thank you!

[LifesLesson]

No joke.... its the job.... like personally I cant work at a normal job. repetition drive me crazy and i never made it past a year. now im in college almost done with a computer engineering degree and looking to get a job where things will require mental use and solving problems. thats where ADHD shine the brightest. having ADHD and solving problems goes hand in hand no one is better than us. XD try getting a job that requires something like that. hope it helps.

[underwaterrocketship in reply to LifesLesson]

The idea that there's success in specific job gives me hope, thank you. The job I was offered was a "creative" title so I'm hoping this fits the description.

[Nerplederp]

I’d definitely get meds ASAP, made a world of difference for me. Caffeine used to be a treatment for ADHD, perhaps a stopgap until you can get to a doc?

Barring that, write everything down and put everything on your work calendar with reminders. Every bit of work I’m asked to do gets ticketed, which also helps me remember what I’ve accomplished at annual reviews.

[underwaterrocketship in reply to Nerplederp]

Yes I totally agree, I live my life by a checklist. Working on it right now, thank you.

[diamondsinthewater]

I, too, spent many years questioning myself and my capabilities because my life had been so filled with negative reinforcement. In "my day," ADD was unheard of, especially for women. The one thing I figured out early was that I had to rely on myself for my own survival, so I sucked it up and learned to compensate for my ADD. Over the years I also figured out that I was my own worst critic, and "good enough" was really good enough. I'd never receiving much positive feedback from anyone, so I was pretty down on myself until a wise counselor told me I had to stop the negative self-talk. So every morning, I would say this in front of the mirror: "I am one, whole, and fully balanced, and I am capable of good and great things!" Then I'd take a deep breath, put a smile on my face, and face life.

Eventually I figured out that "everyone has something," and my "something" just happens to be my ADD ... which is also why I am so creative and can think outside the box and can multitask like a pro and can empathize with others who "can't get it all together" and can laugh at myself when I can't find my keys. I make no bones about it these days. I don't have to make excuses because my work speaks for itself, so now I just tell people I have ADD. I also tell them that I can't remember faces, but I have a great sense of humor! I end with, "so please bear with me!"

ADD really isn't so bad once you get the hang of it. So after many years of trying to figure out what was "wrong" with me, I have learned to focus on what is "right" with me. When I think about it now, I wouldn't trade my ADD--it's good for a laugh now and then! Good luck to you, underwaterrocketship ... and to everyone else in "the big struggle"! I'll close with:

You are enough.

You are here for a reason.

Your smile makes a difference.

You are stronger than you have ever imagined.

You will make it.

You are appreciated.

You can make your dreams come true.

You are beautiful.

You are worth it.

You are loved!

👍

[Cappy11 in reply to diamondsinthewater]

I'm at that point where I've realized I've been my biggest critic for so many years and I'm really working on the tone of my self-talk.

I want to say most of my days recently have been good in that sense, but everyone once in a while something goes wrong and that negative self-talk comes crashing back. It surprises me and the struggle feels worthless. Like two steps forwards, but then two steps back too.

So reading this today helped, if even for a little while.

[diamondsinthewater in reply to Cappy11]

Keep it up! Life is a day at a time ... and sometimes a minute at a time! 👍